Facing scary situations at work?
8.15pm - alone on a long empty platform waiting for the 8.30pm train from London Paddington to Heathrow. Another person appeared. He had the entire platform to choose a spot to wait but he came and stood next to me.
My heart started to race.
‘Stop it' I said to my amygdala.
‘Calm down' I said to my hypothalamus but it continued to flood my body with adrenaline.
All my amygdalae could see was a "young man of middle eastern appearance with a backpack."
My pre-frontal cortex was appalled and embarrassed at my limbic system response. My cortex had no idea whether the young man was from the Middle East or not - and even if he was, so what?
I took deep breaths. I kept telling myself that my reaction was irrational and that my body should calm down.
Stop Think Act.
Eventually the 8.30pm train arrived. I stepped on, sat down and my heart rate slowed. I started to Rewire...
Deep in the ocean
Two months later, off the Neptune Islands in South Australia I was in a cage heading towards the ocean floor hoping to get up close and personal with some Great White Sharks.
One came soon enough - ‘Cheeky Girl' - 4.2 metres and 1000 kg. She was BIG! And I saw her many teeth as she passed several times within a metre of me while she attempted to snatch the bait hanging off the back of the boat!
The 30 minutes in the cage passed in a flash.
But did my life flash before my eyes?
Back on board I realised that my heart rate had not increased at all when I came face to face with this enormous predator. All I felt was awe and wonder as I watched one of the most amazing animals I have ever seen.
So what was the difference? Why did I experience the fight/flight response so fully on a London train platform but not at all when within touching distance of a Great White Shark?
Preparing for sharks - the type we find at work
The answer lies in preparation and learning (Rewiring) from experience.
I had searched for GWS once before. But even with 3 days of turning the ocean red with burly including tuna heads, blood and guts - no shark appeared on that trip. So much for ‘blood in the water attracts sharks!'
However what we did do on that ‘no show' trip was to talk a lot about GWS with experts, practice descents in the cage, watched videos, looked at GWS photos and listened to research - all of which prepared us for the recent trip - and took away the fear.
In contrast, the man on the platform was a complete surprise. It was the end of a fabulous trip to the UK; I had just been shopping in Oxford Street and was looking forward to returning to Sydney.
I simply wasn't focussed on what was happening on the platform or that any risks or dangers could be lurking there.
So I was unprepared for the possibility that a man could appear on the platform and trigger an ANT (automatic negative thought) that cracked my almonds (amygdalae) with a sledgehammer!
And I had no previous experience from which to train my amygdala not to react to a racist stereotype automatically stored in my brain's ‘database of nasty things' after September 11, 2001.
Face the fear and defuse the almonds
At work, ‘the man on the platform' might turn up as a surprise outburst from the boss; an urgent deadline abruptly imposed; a retrenchment to be made, a dramatic fall in share price or an unanticipated cut in funding.
And ‘Cheeky Girl' could show up when you anticipate the performance appraisal next week, a future presentation to the Board, an interview for a promotion, the switch over to a new system.
In other words, there will be some sudden and unexpected events that will catch us off guard. At those times, it is likely that we'll experience The Almond Effect® - the fight/flight response - even though our lives are not at risk.
When that happens, use the STAR technique - and focus especially on Rewiring afterwards - what can you learn from the experience?
The more times you experience something confronting, the less confronting it becomes. Your amygdala learns that it is nothing to be overly concerned about.
Do not beat yourself up for reacting even though your pre-frontal cortex knows you should not have. We are hard wired for survival and our amygdalae do not know the difference between physical and psychological threats.
However when you know that a ‘scary' situation is coming up (Cheeky Girl) - do everything you can to minimise the impact of The Almond Effect® by preparing as much as possible.
Show your amygdala that there are no potentially fatal consequences to what you are about to do.
Then perhaps you'll even enjoy coming face to face with your Great White Shark!
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Kick Start 2012 with these Tips
My gift of Tips and Strategies for 2012
Thank you for your continuing interest and feedback on my thoughts, tips and stories in using our knowledge about the human brain to develop better leaders.
The more we learn and discover about The Almond Effect and other neuroscience, the better we will become at developing and being change leaders.
In appreciation, here is an e-book full of tips and strategies from over 30 experts on how to make 2012 your best year ever.
Click here to download your copy. I hope you enjoy it.
I wish you and the ones you love a wonderful 2012.
PS If you prefer Facebook for CLUES and a whole lot more including discussion and ideas from other contributors, go to Anne Riches on Facebook and Like the page
Thank you for your continuing interest and feedback on my thoughts, tips and stories in using our knowledge about the human brain to develop better leaders.
The more we learn and discover about The Almond Effect and other neuroscience, the better we will become at developing and being change leaders.
In appreciation, here is an e-book full of tips and strategies from over 30 experts on how to make 2012 your best year ever.
Click here to download your copy. I hope you enjoy it.
I wish you and the ones you love a wonderful 2012.
PS If you prefer Facebook for CLUES and a whole lot more including discussion and ideas from other contributors, go to Anne Riches on Facebook and Like the page
Friday, November 04, 2011
Do you work with someone with Depression? Would you employ someone with depression?
Statistically the chances are that you are working with a person who is coping with a mood disorder such as Depression or Bipolar Disorder or that you have recruited someone with this challenge. It may be that you are the one with the mood disorder or have a family member who is.
Recent research published in BMC Medicine tells us that 15% of the population in high income countries are likely to experience depression in their lifetime, with 5.5% experiencing depression last year. In low to middle income countries, this number is 11%. You can read the full text of the research here.
The experience of a Major Depressive Episode (MDE) is higher (over 30%) in USA, France and the Netherlands, and lowest in China (12%). The incidence of MDE was very high in India (over 36%) though the Indian Health Ministry is unhappy with that finding.
So potentially, 1 in 6 of your employees, your team leaders, your managers, your customer service representatives, your salespeople, your number crunchers, your lawyers (actually it's statistically much higher for lawyers), your safety staff in fact anyone in any occupation may be clinically depressed at work at any time.
Depression is prevalent in the best countries to live
In Australia the most often cited statistic is that 1 in 6 women and 1 in 4 men will experience Depression in their lifetime, an average of 1 in 5.
This is worrying given that the 2011 United Nations Human Development Index rates the five best places to live as Norway, Australia, the Netherlands, the US and New Zealand and the World Health Organisation suggests that by the year 2020, Depression will be the world's second global burden of disease. It already is for men and women between 15 and 44 years of age.
Do you have workmates who are depressed?
The symptoms of depression include poor concentration, lack of motivation, little interest in anything, low energy and disturbed sleep. Just getting out of bed, showering and getting to work can be a major achievement.
What is the impact of these conditions on the quality and quantity of work of your employees ?
Productivity, quality, safety and engagement
It is not simply a challenging health issue, it is a productivity, safety and indeed, an engagement issue.
Why engagement? Because Depression (and Bipolar Disorder) don't pick and choose where to land. They are prevalent. And may be impacting your best performers.
What you do to support them and the people around them, may be a critical factor in choices that your employees make to remain with you or move on.
How do you support depressed employees?
There is a range of alternatives available that can bring relief. They include the 'talking' therapies, i.e. counselling, working with a psychologist, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Dialectical Behaviour Therapy and so on.
Exercise is a powerful tool with research showing that 30 minutes of exercise a day is the equivalent of a dose of Prozac.
Mindfulness mediation is also being shown to be amazingly valuable.
But given that most people with jobs spend most of their waking hours at work, we have to think about the role of the manager and of colleagues and team mates – does what you do help or hinder recovery?
It’s nothing to do with me
If you don't think it's anything to do with you, think in hard terms of the bottom line. Ignoring it or even inadvertently making it worst, will impact your goals and the morale in your organisation.
In my experience, there are two main barriers.
First there is still such stigma attached to Depression that people don't admit to it. And if they do, people around them simply don't know what to do or say so they either do and say nothing or say things like 'just move on, get over it, don't bring it to work, there are 'plenty more fish in the sea', you'll find someone else, pull your socks up, it's not my problem, go and get a coffee, just take a few days off, take my advice and....' etc.
Underlying those thoughts is the notion that the person is just malingering.
But people don't choose to be depressed. It is an awful place to be. It is not something you can just 'snap out of' just like you can't just snap out of cancer or heart disease.
It is a medical condition. It is real but it is manageable.
Second, people are afraid to raise the issue. It's an example of what I call The Almond Effect. In this case, your amygdala warns you that by raising the issue you could be opening a Pandora's Box, that you haven't got time for it, that you might tip them over the edge, that they'll tell you that it's none of your business - all responses that you may not feel equipped to handle so we become fearful and don’t raise it.
But with 1 in 6 men and 1 in 4 women at risk, it is as significant a work issue as physical safety at work. It is not something that can be ignored.
What should you say or do?
One of the biggest fears is not knowing what to do or say.
I have given many presentations to CEO's, managers amd employees about the signs, symptoms, causes and treatments for Depression. Invariably these talks of themselves open up a significant channel for communication about an issue that remains stigmatised and troubling for employers and staff alike.
As a first step, provide your team with information and skills to work with colleagues with a mood disorder. I know that this will translate into increased productivity and engagement as people begin to understand the issues and how to help.
This is not just the right thing to do, it will produce tangible results on your bottom line. It gives real meaning and practical application to the words 'we care about our people'.
Tips:
* Don't ignore it
* You won't tip people over the edge if you ask them if they are ok
* If you don't know where to start, begin by simply asking them how they are feeling
* Go a little further by saying what you've noticed in their mood or behaviour and gently describing what that is
* Don't be judgemental
* Don't think or tell them they are weak. The strongest people I know are people with Depression - think what they have to manage each day to even get to work, let alone perform well
* Don't think you have to give advice – that’s not what they need
* Use all your best listening skills - use open ended questions and acknowledge that you are listening with your body language and eye contact
* Encourage them to seek help if they have not already
* Validate them. i.e. let them know that you understand that it is a real experience for them and that it’s OK to talk about feeling down
* Suggest they speak to their GP or to the workplace employee health services provider
What you should do next if this is an issue in your workplace
1. Invite me to give a free awareness raising session in your workplace
2. Contact me if you’d like more information
3. Visit the Black Dog Institute website for facts sheets and resources
Recent research published in BMC Medicine tells us that 15% of the population in high income countries are likely to experience depression in their lifetime, with 5.5% experiencing depression last year. In low to middle income countries, this number is 11%. You can read the full text of the research here.
The experience of a Major Depressive Episode (MDE) is higher (over 30%) in USA, France and the Netherlands, and lowest in China (12%). The incidence of MDE was very high in India (over 36%) though the Indian Health Ministry is unhappy with that finding.
So potentially, 1 in 6 of your employees, your team leaders, your managers, your customer service representatives, your salespeople, your number crunchers, your lawyers (actually it's statistically much higher for lawyers), your safety staff in fact anyone in any occupation may be clinically depressed at work at any time.
Depression is prevalent in the best countries to live
In Australia the most often cited statistic is that 1 in 6 women and 1 in 4 men will experience Depression in their lifetime, an average of 1 in 5.
This is worrying given that the 2011 United Nations Human Development Index rates the five best places to live as Norway, Australia, the Netherlands, the US and New Zealand and the World Health Organisation suggests that by the year 2020, Depression will be the world's second global burden of disease. It already is for men and women between 15 and 44 years of age.
Do you have workmates who are depressed?
The symptoms of depression include poor concentration, lack of motivation, little interest in anything, low energy and disturbed sleep. Just getting out of bed, showering and getting to work can be a major achievement.
What is the impact of these conditions on the quality and quantity of work of your employees ?
Productivity, quality, safety and engagement
It is not simply a challenging health issue, it is a productivity, safety and indeed, an engagement issue.
Why engagement? Because Depression (and Bipolar Disorder) don't pick and choose where to land. They are prevalent. And may be impacting your best performers.
What you do to support them and the people around them, may be a critical factor in choices that your employees make to remain with you or move on.
How do you support depressed employees?
There is a range of alternatives available that can bring relief. They include the 'talking' therapies, i.e. counselling, working with a psychologist, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Dialectical Behaviour Therapy and so on.
Exercise is a powerful tool with research showing that 30 minutes of exercise a day is the equivalent of a dose of Prozac.
Mindfulness mediation is also being shown to be amazingly valuable.
But given that most people with jobs spend most of their waking hours at work, we have to think about the role of the manager and of colleagues and team mates – does what you do help or hinder recovery?
It’s nothing to do with me
If you don't think it's anything to do with you, think in hard terms of the bottom line. Ignoring it or even inadvertently making it worst, will impact your goals and the morale in your organisation.
In my experience, there are two main barriers.
First there is still such stigma attached to Depression that people don't admit to it. And if they do, people around them simply don't know what to do or say so they either do and say nothing or say things like 'just move on, get over it, don't bring it to work, there are 'plenty more fish in the sea', you'll find someone else, pull your socks up, it's not my problem, go and get a coffee, just take a few days off, take my advice and....' etc.
Underlying those thoughts is the notion that the person is just malingering.
But people don't choose to be depressed. It is an awful place to be. It is not something you can just 'snap out of' just like you can't just snap out of cancer or heart disease.
It is a medical condition. It is real but it is manageable.
Second, people are afraid to raise the issue. It's an example of what I call The Almond Effect. In this case, your amygdala warns you that by raising the issue you could be opening a Pandora's Box, that you haven't got time for it, that you might tip them over the edge, that they'll tell you that it's none of your business - all responses that you may not feel equipped to handle so we become fearful and don’t raise it.
But with 1 in 6 men and 1 in 4 women at risk, it is as significant a work issue as physical safety at work. It is not something that can be ignored.
What should you say or do?
One of the biggest fears is not knowing what to do or say.
I have given many presentations to CEO's, managers amd employees about the signs, symptoms, causes and treatments for Depression. Invariably these talks of themselves open up a significant channel for communication about an issue that remains stigmatised and troubling for employers and staff alike.
As a first step, provide your team with information and skills to work with colleagues with a mood disorder. I know that this will translate into increased productivity and engagement as people begin to understand the issues and how to help.
This is not just the right thing to do, it will produce tangible results on your bottom line. It gives real meaning and practical application to the words 'we care about our people'.
Tips:
* Don't ignore it
* You won't tip people over the edge if you ask them if they are ok
* If you don't know where to start, begin by simply asking them how they are feeling
* Go a little further by saying what you've noticed in their mood or behaviour and gently describing what that is
* Don't be judgemental
* Don't think or tell them they are weak. The strongest people I know are people with Depression - think what they have to manage each day to even get to work, let alone perform well
* Don't think you have to give advice – that’s not what they need
* Use all your best listening skills - use open ended questions and acknowledge that you are listening with your body language and eye contact
* Encourage them to seek help if they have not already
* Validate them. i.e. let them know that you understand that it is a real experience for them and that it’s OK to talk about feeling down
* Suggest they speak to their GP or to the workplace employee health services provider
What you should do next if this is an issue in your workplace
1. Invite me to give a free awareness raising session in your workplace
2. Contact me if you’d like more information
3. Visit the Black Dog Institute website for facts sheets and resources
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Is technology dramatically changing the way our brains work?
Do you have a bigger brain because you have a lot of Friends on Facebook or is it the other way around? Have a look at this interesting research from University College London.
If neuroscientists discover that our grey matter increases the more social networking we do - that will raise some challenging questions for employers around the optimal use of time at work for employees, won't it!!!
If neuroscientists discover that our grey matter increases the more social networking we do - that will raise some challenging questions for employers around the optimal use of time at work for employees, won't it!!!
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
My Tip for Procrastinators
I’m one of those people who love to get things done. Give me a big challenge or a difficult task to do, I’m on it!
But simple things like deciding what to get for dinner if my partner is home or what to wear? I can mess around for ages on those.
In my blogpost July 2008 I wrote about Procrastination and invited reader’s comments.
Could you live with this person?
Here is one person’s reply that made me think again about when and why I procrastinate.
“I have a close relationship with a person (my partner) however he procrastinates about everything.
If I ask what he would like for dinner he walks away pretending he didn't hear me asking him.
Anything that is in the "too hard" basket for him is left for later with some excuse.
There are broken things in the house that have been broken for years!
He was made redundant from his job a few years back and it took him nearly a year to finally pick a new job after many offers.
We have been together for over 30 years and initially I put this behaviour down to laziness and it was the cause of many disagreements in our relationship.
After a while I got to understand his reasons even though he won't discuss them.
It comes down to this. If he does some of this stuff and it is not right then he is most fearful that someone will criticise him, even though he might be criticised for not doing it.
I believe that some of this is due to the relationship my husband had with his father who was a controlling man - best intentions I am sure.
There was a constant battle of wits in that family, hiding "stuff" from dad so he would not know about it and therefore could not comment. I think this learned behaviour and fear is one of those things that have become part of his nature. He knows about it but can't get past the reliance on blaming his behaviour on his upbringing and what is the "norm".
I have come to terms that he needs gentle coaxing and encouragement and a pat on the back when he does accomplish something - after all we are all babies in big people's bodies!
Thanks for the opportunity to comment. I regularly receive your newsletters and I really do enjoy reading them.”
Fear and perfectionism – the (im)perfect match
Wow – she must be a saint! That behaviour would drive me crazy!
Yet her comments stung me. Why - because I can make decisions and do most things quickly except writing. That’s a whole different ballgame.
I’ll research, get readily sidetracked, distracted, busy, in fact anything except writing and then, well, there’s another day gone and I still haven’t done the writing I want to.
I don’t believe I’m lazy or inefficient. Yet ironically a task that is not that difficult for me once I get going, has me running in search of anything else to do rather than the thing I should be doing.
Lots of reasons for it but in a nutshell, it’s your amygdala
Some authors suggest that procrastination is a time management issue.
Others talk about it coming from fear of failure, fear of success, fear of loss of autonomy, fear of attachment. Whatever it is, there is one common thread, fear.
For me, it is fear of not being perfect. Isn’t that ridiculous? Yet my perfectionism has been (and still is) the biggest personal challenge in my life. it stops me doing things.
It’s The Almond Effect® again. My amygdala believes that somehow if what I do is not perfect, I am in someway a lesser person and won’t be successful. Seems like madness to some but the frustration of procrastination is real.
What to do about it
And just as my wonderful correspondent observed of her partner, my father had a huge role to play in setting up this state of mind for me.
So some of you will belong to the ‘Socks’ school of thought - just pull your socks up and get over it. Easy to say if you’re not a perfectionist!
If only it worked like that. Behaviours built up over decades don’t miraculously change overnight.
In my experience, the best way to deal with it is the Nike approach: Just do it. If your world doesn’t fall in and no one gets hurt, it’s probably safe.
Gentle coaxing and encouragement and a pat on the back
The strategy that struck me in my correspondents note was what seems like a statement of the obvious but often simply not done: coaxing, encouraging, supporting and acknowledgement.
This approach works for change leaders as well as in the family. Set up the opportunity and persuade resistors, recalcitrants, procrastinators to try out the new ways of doing things in the development stage and before you go live. It can work wonders.
And if you encourage, support, and recognize their achievements you often turn your most reluctant participants into advocates.
Just do it
But for me, this quote from a University of North Carolina article sums it up:
The art of writing is the art of applying the seat of the pants to the seat of the chair — Mary Heaton Vorse
That’s just what I did to write this CLUES and I think that applies to everything we put off doing!
I’m one of those people who love to get things done. Give me a big challenge or a difficult task to do, I’m on it!
But simple things like deciding what to get for dinner if my partner is home or what to wear? I can mess around for ages on those.
In my blogpost July 2008 I wrote about Procrastination and invited reader’s comments.
Could you live with this person?
Here is one person’s reply that made me think again about when and why I procrastinate.
“I have a close relationship with a person (my partner) however he procrastinates about everything.
If I ask what he would like for dinner he walks away pretending he didn't hear me asking him.
Anything that is in the "too hard" basket for him is left for later with some excuse.
There are broken things in the house that have been broken for years!
He was made redundant from his job a few years back and it took him nearly a year to finally pick a new job after many offers.
We have been together for over 30 years and initially I put this behaviour down to laziness and it was the cause of many disagreements in our relationship.
After a while I got to understand his reasons even though he won't discuss them.
It comes down to this. If he does some of this stuff and it is not right then he is most fearful that someone will criticise him, even though he might be criticised for not doing it.
I believe that some of this is due to the relationship my husband had with his father who was a controlling man - best intentions I am sure.
There was a constant battle of wits in that family, hiding "stuff" from dad so he would not know about it and therefore could not comment. I think this learned behaviour and fear is one of those things that have become part of his nature. He knows about it but can't get past the reliance on blaming his behaviour on his upbringing and what is the "norm".
I have come to terms that he needs gentle coaxing and encouragement and a pat on the back when he does accomplish something - after all we are all babies in big people's bodies!
Thanks for the opportunity to comment. I regularly receive your newsletters and I really do enjoy reading them.”
Fear and perfectionism – the (im)perfect match
Wow – she must be a saint! That behaviour would drive me crazy!
Yet her comments stung me. Why - because I can make decisions and do most things quickly except writing. That’s a whole different ballgame.
I’ll research, get readily sidetracked, distracted, busy, in fact anything except writing and then, well, there’s another day gone and I still haven’t done the writing I want to.
I don’t believe I’m lazy or inefficient. Yet ironically a task that is not that difficult for me once I get going, has me running in search of anything else to do rather than the thing I should be doing.
Lots of reasons for it but in a nutshell, it’s your amygdala
Some authors suggest that procrastination is a time management issue.
Others talk about it coming from fear of failure, fear of success, fear of loss of autonomy, fear of attachment. Whatever it is, there is one common thread, fear.
For me, it is fear of not being perfect. Isn’t that ridiculous? Yet my perfectionism has been (and still is) the biggest personal challenge in my life. it stops me doing things.
It’s The Almond Effect® again. My amygdala believes that somehow if what I do is not perfect, I am in someway a lesser person and won’t be successful. Seems like madness to some but the frustration of procrastination is real.
What to do about it
And just as my wonderful correspondent observed of her partner, my father had a huge role to play in setting up this state of mind for me.
So some of you will belong to the ‘Socks’ school of thought - just pull your socks up and get over it. Easy to say if you’re not a perfectionist!
If only it worked like that. Behaviours built up over decades don’t miraculously change overnight.
In my experience, the best way to deal with it is the Nike approach: Just do it. If your world doesn’t fall in and no one gets hurt, it’s probably safe.
Gentle coaxing and encouragement and a pat on the back
The strategy that struck me in my correspondents note was what seems like a statement of the obvious but often simply not done: coaxing, encouraging, supporting and acknowledgement.
This approach works for change leaders as well as in the family. Set up the opportunity and persuade resistors, recalcitrants, procrastinators to try out the new ways of doing things in the development stage and before you go live. It can work wonders.
And if you encourage, support, and recognize their achievements you often turn your most reluctant participants into advocates.
Just do it
But for me, this quote from a University of North Carolina article sums it up:
The art of writing is the art of applying the seat of the pants to the seat of the chair — Mary Heaton Vorse
That’s just what I did to write this CLUES and I think that applies to everything we put off doing!
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Daniel Goleman describes The Almond Effect
The August 2011 newsletter from Six Seconds reports how Daniel Goleman describes what I call The Almond Effect. Great description.
He describes the neurological response to stress, or a threat, as a pure survival mechanism designed to guide us through “a short-term emergency” which has evolved into “an ongoing hazard for performance.” This ongoing hazard is the neurological spiral of stress that has us trapped.
Goleman explains that our “attention narrows to focus on the cause of the stress, not the task at hand; our memory reshuffles to promote thoughts most relevant to what’s stressing us and we fall back on over learned habits. The brain’s executive centers – our neural circuitry for paying attention, comprehension and learning – are hijacked by our circuitry for handling stress.”
Thus, we’re stuck until we become aware of our own stress spiral. Those with more emotional awareness and stronger skills in managing feelings are able to turn this cycle around more quickly.
From a neurological standpoint Goleman notes, “people who can manage their emotions well are able to recover more quickly from stress arousal.” Once we recognize that we’re on a destructive path, we can actively work to retrieve the brain’s executive centers from the stress spiral and begin to make better decisions.
As Goleman describes it, our “attention becomes nimble and focused again, our mind flexible, and our bodies relaxed. And a state of relaxed alertness is optimal for performance.” Thus our stressful situation becomes more manageable and the bigger picture is once again visible.
If you are a regular reader of these posts, you will know that using my STAR approach Stop - Think - Act - Rewire develops the skills to be able to manage stressful situations (The Almond Effect) not only while they are happening but also to better handle future triggers. STAR builds self-awareness and confidence and an ability to deal with what life throws at you. That seemed to me to be the best reason to develop it!
Thursday, August 25, 2011
I remember it like it happened yesterday...but you probably don’t!
“We’ve tried that before”
“Here we go again”
These two phrases torment every change implementer’s life. They usually signal negativity to the change that you want to instigate.
And these words are not only used by change resistors at work, I’d guess many of you have heard them or even used them yourself at home!
Researchers such as Lila Davachi who study the way that memories are formed and later recalled, say that it is rare that we accurately recall exactly what happened in the first instance. This is because a memory is not a single function or brain system/network.
For example, even if you were close to and witnessed a powerful event like 9/11 or your colleagues made redundant in a restructure, your memory of it might not be as clear as you thought.
There’s a great illustration of this written by Greg Boustead in Scientific American How the brain remembers 9/11
It is an example of Davachi’s explanation at the NeuroLeadership Summit in the USA that memory is never an exact playback of the video of the experience. Rather it is a reconstruction of the event drawn from many different parts of the brain.
And because memories are not stored in a single location, when we ‘remember’ something, we may not remember or recall accurately all the elements of the event.
This topic was discussed at the World Science Festival 2011 in the session on The Unbearable Lightness of Memory
"One of the primary functions of memory is to be able to use our experience of the past to be able to act adaptively in the future" – Elizabeth Phelps
"When we remember an event from the past we are drawing on information that we've actually experienced BUT sometimes we're combining that incorrectly with other things that we may not have experienced. These mistakes can have important consequences, especially in the legal world." – Daniel L. Schacter
We increase the durability of a memory if it has an emotional connection
Some research has been done to show that memories formed in the presence of negative emotions are more likely to be recalled clearly.
Think about your holiday last year. You probably don’t recall the detail of the logistics that went well. But you will definitely recall where and when it went wrong.
For example, earlier this year I travelled in Europe and Africa. I can barely recall the details of the check-in counters in most airports but I can remember the one in Morocco.
I clearly recollect that the check in woman in Marrakesh said: Would you like me to check this through to Johannesburg for you?
And that was the last I saw of my bag for three and a half weeks!
I can easily bring to mind the emotion, the frustration I felt that my bag was lost. And the memory or the whole saga is triggered every time I see an Air France plane or advertisement – guess which airline I flew?
But it would be fascinating to see if my memory of the check-in woman’s words and how the situation was ultimately resolved is accurate.
Overcoming past memories of change
The job of the amygdala is to watch out for signals that might compromise our safety and survival. That’s what The Almond Effect® is: when the amygdalae confuse the actions and behaviours of others in a non-life threatening situation as a threat to our physical survival and cause us to act accordingly with one of the 4 F’s.
If you add this together to what is known about memory recall, then you have to have a plan for what can you do when you hear words of resistance based on perceived history.
Your goal is to reduce the fear, anxieties and stress being stirred up by past memories. Until you do that, the limbic system and especially the amygdala creates a smokescreen which logic and reason will find hard to get through.
As a first step, my suggestion is that you simply accept that their negativity is being triggered by memory whether it is accurate or not. It won’t help if you tell them they’ve got it all wrong. That’s an appeal to their logic at a time when their evolutionary survival instincts are on red alert.
Instead ask them and any others who were around at the time of the previous events, what happened previously or what recollections are triggering their views that it’s all been done before. Then check that against any known facts about the event.
Maybe they were right on the money but I’d bet that their recall of the event will reveal differences between what was happening in the past and what you are proposing now. If they were right then you’ve got some valuable information to work on to ensure that your change activity this time is different and won’t arouse the same negativity.
But if you can show them the difference and explain in positive terms why what is being proposed now is different to what they recall happened last time, you’ve enhanced your chances of change success.
Until a pill is marketed for eliminating particular remembrances that we’d prefer to forget, it’s worth operating on the premise that many of our recalled experiences are based on the feelings we had at that time, not necessarily the facts.
Learning how to deal with these emotions that accompany change will significantly enhance your ability as a change leader.
Tuesday, August 02, 2011
Getting People to Change
When would you give up your passion? How would you feel if someone told you that you had no choice?
This happened to a good friend recently. She was told that for health reasons she would have to stop scuba diving, at least in the short term, maybe forever.
It was heartbreaking for her. As a keen diver myself, the thought of not being able to explore below the ocean’s surface is simply awful.
Change is hard work whatever the situation
The mechanisms for changing what we love to do or are simply comfortable with, are the same in our personal lives and at work. We have to rewire our brain. We can do this because our brains have plasticity.
The nature and intensity of our motivation to change will differ in various circumstances but regardless of our reasons for wanting to change behaviours or thought patterns, we will have to create new neural pathways and then to use them in preference to the old ones.
Until the new patterns become the new default response, it is hard brain work. Think about when you are tired and how easy it is to default to established patterns.
The old patterns are seductive
For example, when we had our kitchen renovated last year, I still found myself looking in the old place where the cutlery was kept until I got used to the new location.
And recently I was driving back from a meeting in Sydney’s northern suburbs to another at Rushcutters Bay in the East. Coincidentally it’s the same route as if I was going home. I was so busy thinking about what I was going to say at the meeting that I was driving on auto-pilot. I missed the turn to the meeting and found myself on my way home!
(Then I experienced The Almond Effect® and became anxious about being late and the impression that my lateness might create.)
Some other examples: using your old phone’s commands on a new phone, using old keystroke patterns on new systems at work, using approaches that used to work with your our old boss on the new one!
And maybe there are some things that are so hard-wired that people can never change. I am thinking here of a friend from Scotland who has lived more than 40 years in Australia and still has a really strong Scottish accent!
When we have to change, and even if we are strongly motivated to do so, we need to stay actively focused on changing our behaviours.
If not, you may find yourself in a situation where the old behaviours are triggered automatically and the old behaviours reappear.
Our autopilot at work
Many managers seem to overlook this. They become frustrated and impatient with the time it takes for people to adopt change at work.
They get tired of answering questions like:
But what about…? What’s wrong with the existing way? We’ve tried this before, what makes you think it will work this time?
Many questions are rationally based, yet many more have an emotional basis.
As managers, getting commitment to change requires us to respond to those emotion-based concerns even though we are under time pressures and deadlines. It is false economy not to do so.
Successful change leaders know this.
Failure to address the emotionally based questions results in delayed or failed change efforts. After all, these questions are triggered by our amygdala which are concerned with anything that doesn’t fit the existing patterns we know are ‘safe.’
We still see more than 40% of change projects failing to realize the projected goals of the change.
IBM identified the most significant challenge to change as Changing Mindsets and Attitudes in its Global Study Making Change Work 2008.
In a 2009 survey of CEOs, IBM identified Complexity as the number one challenge for CEOs and leaders currently.
Here is one of their recommendations:
“How CEOs can capitalize on complexity:
The effects of rising complexity calls for CEOs and their teams to lead with bold creativity connect with customers in imaginative ways and design their operations for speed and flexibility to position their organisations for twenty-first century success”
So even if Complexity is the number one challenge for leaders, dealing with it may require changed mindsets. Many executives will have to change their own behaviour as well as the behaviours of others.
How do we change ourselves and others?
It’s worth remembering that:
• Humans are hard wired for survival above all else
• Our default thinking is habitual and self-perpetuating
• Everyone is the product of their own experiences with different motivations and unique memories
• Change can be frustratingly slow because it’s hard brain work to rewire – even if it is logical and in the best interests
So to create the optimum conditions, change leaders should:
• acknowledge past patterns were OK at that time
• fully explain the ‘why’ of the change, the WIFM and ‘what will happen ‘if we don’t’
• understand “once is not enough” and send consistent change messages in multiple ways through multiple channels on multiple occasions
• model change – and be congruent
• focus on the emotional side of change; don’t just ‘install’ the new system or process or procedure
• use reward and recognition continuously to embed new brain patterns and behaviour
People don’t change behaviours easily.
This is especially true in workplaces with cultures and histories that are slow and resistant to change. A structured approach and full understanding of how people change is essential for managers and other change agents in today’s fast-moving world where ironically slowing down to get people on board, might be the optimal way to speed up.
As Marilyn Ferguson said:
“No one can persuade another to change. Each of us guards a gate of change that can only be opened from the inside. We cannot open the gate of another, either by argument or emotional appeal.”
This happened to a good friend recently. She was told that for health reasons she would have to stop scuba diving, at least in the short term, maybe forever.
It was heartbreaking for her. As a keen diver myself, the thought of not being able to explore below the ocean’s surface is simply awful.
Change is hard work whatever the situation
The mechanisms for changing what we love to do or are simply comfortable with, are the same in our personal lives and at work. We have to rewire our brain. We can do this because our brains have plasticity.
The nature and intensity of our motivation to change will differ in various circumstances but regardless of our reasons for wanting to change behaviours or thought patterns, we will have to create new neural pathways and then to use them in preference to the old ones.
Until the new patterns become the new default response, it is hard brain work. Think about when you are tired and how easy it is to default to established patterns.
The old patterns are seductive
For example, when we had our kitchen renovated last year, I still found myself looking in the old place where the cutlery was kept until I got used to the new location.
And recently I was driving back from a meeting in Sydney’s northern suburbs to another at Rushcutters Bay in the East. Coincidentally it’s the same route as if I was going home. I was so busy thinking about what I was going to say at the meeting that I was driving on auto-pilot. I missed the turn to the meeting and found myself on my way home!
(Then I experienced The Almond Effect® and became anxious about being late and the impression that my lateness might create.)
Some other examples: using your old phone’s commands on a new phone, using old keystroke patterns on new systems at work, using approaches that used to work with your our old boss on the new one!
And maybe there are some things that are so hard-wired that people can never change. I am thinking here of a friend from Scotland who has lived more than 40 years in Australia and still has a really strong Scottish accent!
When we have to change, and even if we are strongly motivated to do so, we need to stay actively focused on changing our behaviours.
If not, you may find yourself in a situation where the old behaviours are triggered automatically and the old behaviours reappear.
Our autopilot at work
Many managers seem to overlook this. They become frustrated and impatient with the time it takes for people to adopt change at work.
They get tired of answering questions like:
But what about…? What’s wrong with the existing way? We’ve tried this before, what makes you think it will work this time?
Many questions are rationally based, yet many more have an emotional basis.
As managers, getting commitment to change requires us to respond to those emotion-based concerns even though we are under time pressures and deadlines. It is false economy not to do so.
Successful change leaders know this.
Failure to address the emotionally based questions results in delayed or failed change efforts. After all, these questions are triggered by our amygdala which are concerned with anything that doesn’t fit the existing patterns we know are ‘safe.’
We still see more than 40% of change projects failing to realize the projected goals of the change.
IBM identified the most significant challenge to change as Changing Mindsets and Attitudes in its Global Study Making Change Work 2008.
In a 2009 survey of CEOs, IBM identified Complexity as the number one challenge for CEOs and leaders currently.
Here is one of their recommendations:
“How CEOs can capitalize on complexity:
The effects of rising complexity calls for CEOs and their teams to lead with bold creativity connect with customers in imaginative ways and design their operations for speed and flexibility to position their organisations for twenty-first century success”
So even if Complexity is the number one challenge for leaders, dealing with it may require changed mindsets. Many executives will have to change their own behaviour as well as the behaviours of others.
How do we change ourselves and others?
It’s worth remembering that:
• Humans are hard wired for survival above all else
• Our default thinking is habitual and self-perpetuating
• Everyone is the product of their own experiences with different motivations and unique memories
• Change can be frustratingly slow because it’s hard brain work to rewire – even if it is logical and in the best interests
So to create the optimum conditions, change leaders should:
• acknowledge past patterns were OK at that time
• fully explain the ‘why’ of the change, the WIFM and ‘what will happen ‘if we don’t’
• understand “once is not enough” and send consistent change messages in multiple ways through multiple channels on multiple occasions
• model change – and be congruent
• focus on the emotional side of change; don’t just ‘install’ the new system or process or procedure
• use reward and recognition continuously to embed new brain patterns and behaviour
People don’t change behaviours easily.
This is especially true in workplaces with cultures and histories that are slow and resistant to change. A structured approach and full understanding of how people change is essential for managers and other change agents in today’s fast-moving world where ironically slowing down to get people on board, might be the optimal way to speed up.
As Marilyn Ferguson said:
“No one can persuade another to change. Each of us guards a gate of change that can only be opened from the inside. We cannot open the gate of another, either by argument or emotional appeal.”
Thursday, June 30, 2011
The Keys to Resilience, Happiness, Self-Confidence and Compassion
There were some interesting 'off the cuff' comments from some Presenters at the Happiness and its Causes Conference in Brisbane recently.
Let me share some that might be of value to you in your work as Change Leaders.
Dr Jane Goodall
It's a pity we've lost the concept of the elders. Then we used to ask 'What are the consequences of our actions for our community, our world, our future? Now we ask: what will make me happy now?
Matthieu Ricard (inspiring!)
Compassion without wisdom is blind; compassion without action is sterile
Dr Robert Biswas-Diener
Life is beautiful because it gives us second chances - until we get it right
Dr Anthony Grant, presenter ABC Making Australia Happy
Eight steps to happiness:
1. Write your eulogy (clarifies your goals and values)
2. Do random acts of kindness
3. Practice mindfulness
4. Identify your strengths
5. Practice gratitude
6. Forgive
7. Develop social networks
8. Reflect, review and renew
Roko Belic, filmmaker The Happy Movie
Everything we do in our lives affects someone. And if it doesn’t, it affects you and that eventually affects someone else
Professor Paula Barrett
The brain continuously forms new cells no matter how old you are as long as you are well, get plenty of sleep, eat a good diet and exercise regularly. (i.e. neuroplasticity)
Michael Rosengren
Ideas for building resilience:
* Develop the skill of 'savouring'
* Spend one hour a week to do something for someone or a cause
* Physically move for one hour a day
* Be present (eg being on your phone when you are supposed to be engaging with someone else or in meetings etc is disrespectful)
* Have someone to love and something to do or to look forward to.
Dr Russ Harris
Self-confidence does not mean no fear or anxiety. Confidence is a cognitive state.
It’s irrational not to be afraid but you can control and manage it.
Genuine confidence is not the absence of fear and anxiety; it is your transformed relationship with it
Sarah Wilson
Negative thoughts are ‘stickier’ than positive thoughts
Dr Paul Eckman
Does being compassionate benefit the giver more than the receiver?
Professor Marco Iacoboni (one of the star presenters in my view)
Our capacity for empathy is hard-wired (mirror neurons)
There are degrees of empathy. We tend to be more empathetic with people or things that are like us
B. Alan Wallace (another fabulous thinker)
Humans can use intelligence to find other ways beyond appearance to find similarities and therefore be empathetic.
We are all creatures of habit but as humans we can choose the habits we want (neuroplasticity).
Professor Pat McGorry
Genuine happiness comes not from what we are getting from the world but rather what we are giving to the world.
Michael J Gelb
How to think like Leonardo da Vinci every day -
* Have an insatiable quest for knowledge and continuous improvement
* Learn from experience, be an independent thinker
* Sharpen your senses – pick up on what is going on around you
* Manage ambiguity and change
* Be a whole brain thinker
* Maintain body as well as mind fitness
* Be a systems thinker.
Should you go to the next one?
I enjoyed the Conference but I did not think it was anywhere near as insightful and illuminating as its sister conference Mind and Its Potential
But as with everything we experience in life, there is always food for thought if you look for it.
So I am confident you found some ideas that resonated with you in the above list.
And if you did, then the next step is: so what will you do with it? What do you need to do more of, less of or keep on doing and how will you hold yourself accountable for that?
Go well.
Let me share some that might be of value to you in your work as Change Leaders.
Dr Jane Goodall
It's a pity we've lost the concept of the elders. Then we used to ask 'What are the consequences of our actions for our community, our world, our future? Now we ask: what will make me happy now?
Matthieu Ricard (inspiring!)
Compassion without wisdom is blind; compassion without action is sterile
Dr Robert Biswas-Diener
Life is beautiful because it gives us second chances - until we get it right
Dr Anthony Grant, presenter ABC Making Australia Happy
Eight steps to happiness:
1. Write your eulogy (clarifies your goals and values)
2. Do random acts of kindness
3. Practice mindfulness
4. Identify your strengths
5. Practice gratitude
6. Forgive
7. Develop social networks
8. Reflect, review and renew
Roko Belic, filmmaker The Happy Movie
Everything we do in our lives affects someone. And if it doesn’t, it affects you and that eventually affects someone else
Professor Paula Barrett
The brain continuously forms new cells no matter how old you are as long as you are well, get plenty of sleep, eat a good diet and exercise regularly. (i.e. neuroplasticity)
Michael Rosengren
Ideas for building resilience:
* Develop the skill of 'savouring'
* Spend one hour a week to do something for someone or a cause
* Physically move for one hour a day
* Be present (eg being on your phone when you are supposed to be engaging with someone else or in meetings etc is disrespectful)
* Have someone to love and something to do or to look forward to.
Dr Russ Harris
Self-confidence does not mean no fear or anxiety. Confidence is a cognitive state.
It’s irrational not to be afraid but you can control and manage it.
Genuine confidence is not the absence of fear and anxiety; it is your transformed relationship with it
Sarah Wilson
Negative thoughts are ‘stickier’ than positive thoughts
Dr Paul Eckman
Does being compassionate benefit the giver more than the receiver?
Professor Marco Iacoboni (one of the star presenters in my view)
Our capacity for empathy is hard-wired (mirror neurons)
There are degrees of empathy. We tend to be more empathetic with people or things that are like us
B. Alan Wallace (another fabulous thinker)
Humans can use intelligence to find other ways beyond appearance to find similarities and therefore be empathetic.
We are all creatures of habit but as humans we can choose the habits we want (neuroplasticity).
Professor Pat McGorry
Genuine happiness comes not from what we are getting from the world but rather what we are giving to the world.
Michael J Gelb
How to think like Leonardo da Vinci every day -
* Have an insatiable quest for knowledge and continuous improvement
* Learn from experience, be an independent thinker
* Sharpen your senses – pick up on what is going on around you
* Manage ambiguity and change
* Be a whole brain thinker
* Maintain body as well as mind fitness
* Be a systems thinker.
Should you go to the next one?
I enjoyed the Conference but I did not think it was anywhere near as insightful and illuminating as its sister conference Mind and Its Potential
But as with everything we experience in life, there is always food for thought if you look for it.
So I am confident you found some ideas that resonated with you in the above list.
And if you did, then the next step is: so what will you do with it? What do you need to do more of, less of or keep on doing and how will you hold yourself accountable for that?
Go well.
Monday, May 16, 2011
Tunnel vision of the grey matter
Peter unashamedly was reading email on his Blackberry in a team meeting. He thought the meetings were a total waste of time. The team leader asked everyone for their point of view but, unless it accorded with his own, their opinions were ignored or worst still, met with a cynical or sarcastic remark or look!
As Peter said to one of his team mates: ‘The man has got tunnel vision of the grey matter!’
Interestingly, he may be right!
How our brain filters stuff out
According to an article in Wired by Jonah Lehrer there could be some truth in Peter’s comments. He has an interesting explanation for why we often see or hear only what we want to see or hear.
We know that our amygdala responds to emotionally significant events that involve some sort of threat to us. Our amygdala continuously assesses whether something is a true life/death or physical risk to us.
And because the amygdala does not distinguish between physical and psychological threat, it also actively assesses threat levels in non-physical risk situations like an email from a client, a look from a colleague or the words of the boss.
In both physical and non-physical situations, if the amygdala activates the threat response and we react without using our thinking brain (pre frontal cortex) resulting in inappropriate behaviours, I call that The Almond Effect®.
Sometimes our intuition is wrong
However it seems that there are times when we don’t want to accept what we hear or see because it doesn’t accord with our expectations or our reality, so our brain carefully edits them out, instead ‘searching for evidence that confirms what we already believe.’
Lehrer describes an experiment conducted by Kevin Dunbar in 2003 at Dartmouth College. Dunbar showed students two video clips of two different sized balls falling to the ground. In one clip the balls hit the ground at the same time. In the other the heavier ball landed first.
The students were asked to select the more accurate representation of the law of gravity.
Those students who were not versed in physics believed that it was unrealistic that the balls would land at the same time, an intuition that strikes a chord with me.
However it is wrong as the science shows (Galileo and Newton) that once the balls reach a critical velocity, they would travel at the same rates and so the scenario where they would land together is correct.
You and your ACC and DLPFC
The part of the brain that registers errors and contradictions is the ACC (anterior cingulate cortex). It gets turned on when we see or hear or in any way sense that something is wrong and doesn’t fit with our patterns of experience. I have heard neuroscientists describe it as the ‘Oh Sh*t’ response.
But Dunbar found that there is another part of our brain, the DLPFC (dorsolateral prefrontal cortex) that is also involved. When it is activated, it suppresses thoughts that don’t square with our preconceptions.
As Lehrer so eloquently puts it, if the ACC is the “Oh Sh*T” circuit, then the DLPFC is the ‘delete’ key.
Don’t waste your time arguing
Now maybe my DLPFC is helping me out here, but this seems like a great explanation about how people behave when they don’t seem to hear or see something that doesn’t accord with their point of view.
And perhaps, significantly, it’s the differentiating factor between managers who can master their DLPFC and say, ‘that’s impossible’ and those who say, ‘that’s interesting – I wonder why you think that may be possible.’
Clearly the latter attitude is the one more likely to be open to innovative ideas, solve difficult complex problems and demonstrate great leadership.
So maybe Peter was right and those meetings are just a waste of time if the boss is only interested in their own point of view.
I suspect we all suffer from ‘tunnel vision of the grey matter’ occasionally but at least you now know why!
And maybe we need to check our own DLPFC if we can't resolve a difficult sitation. Are we in fact stuck because we are filtering out other ways of looking at the situation?
Time to put the headlights on!
As Peter said to one of his team mates: ‘The man has got tunnel vision of the grey matter!’
Interestingly, he may be right!
How our brain filters stuff out
According to an article in Wired by Jonah Lehrer there could be some truth in Peter’s comments. He has an interesting explanation for why we often see or hear only what we want to see or hear.
We know that our amygdala responds to emotionally significant events that involve some sort of threat to us. Our amygdala continuously assesses whether something is a true life/death or physical risk to us.
And because the amygdala does not distinguish between physical and psychological threat, it also actively assesses threat levels in non-physical risk situations like an email from a client, a look from a colleague or the words of the boss.
In both physical and non-physical situations, if the amygdala activates the threat response and we react without using our thinking brain (pre frontal cortex) resulting in inappropriate behaviours, I call that The Almond Effect®.
Sometimes our intuition is wrong
However it seems that there are times when we don’t want to accept what we hear or see because it doesn’t accord with our expectations or our reality, so our brain carefully edits them out, instead ‘searching for evidence that confirms what we already believe.’
Lehrer describes an experiment conducted by Kevin Dunbar in 2003 at Dartmouth College. Dunbar showed students two video clips of two different sized balls falling to the ground. In one clip the balls hit the ground at the same time. In the other the heavier ball landed first.
The students were asked to select the more accurate representation of the law of gravity.
Those students who were not versed in physics believed that it was unrealistic that the balls would land at the same time, an intuition that strikes a chord with me.
However it is wrong as the science shows (Galileo and Newton) that once the balls reach a critical velocity, they would travel at the same rates and so the scenario where they would land together is correct.
You and your ACC and DLPFC
The part of the brain that registers errors and contradictions is the ACC (anterior cingulate cortex). It gets turned on when we see or hear or in any way sense that something is wrong and doesn’t fit with our patterns of experience. I have heard neuroscientists describe it as the ‘Oh Sh*t’ response.
But Dunbar found that there is another part of our brain, the DLPFC (dorsolateral prefrontal cortex) that is also involved. When it is activated, it suppresses thoughts that don’t square with our preconceptions.
As Lehrer so eloquently puts it, if the ACC is the “Oh Sh*T” circuit, then the DLPFC is the ‘delete’ key.
Don’t waste your time arguing
Now maybe my DLPFC is helping me out here, but this seems like a great explanation about how people behave when they don’t seem to hear or see something that doesn’t accord with their point of view.
And perhaps, significantly, it’s the differentiating factor between managers who can master their DLPFC and say, ‘that’s impossible’ and those who say, ‘that’s interesting – I wonder why you think that may be possible.’
Clearly the latter attitude is the one more likely to be open to innovative ideas, solve difficult complex problems and demonstrate great leadership.
So maybe Peter was right and those meetings are just a waste of time if the boss is only interested in their own point of view.
I suspect we all suffer from ‘tunnel vision of the grey matter’ occasionally but at least you now know why!
And maybe we need to check our own DLPFC if we can't resolve a difficult sitation. Are we in fact stuck because we are filtering out other ways of looking at the situation?
Time to put the headlights on!
Friday, April 15, 2011
The only thing to fear...
People in Burberry sunglasses and Victoria’s Secret lingerie are seen queuing for food and handouts because they lost their jobs, their homes, and their incomes in the Global Financial Crisis. Now even their self-esteem is at risk.
Radiation spews into the atmosphere in Japan. Floods in Australia cause drowning and destruction. People are butchered in countries ruled by dictators.
Tsunamis wipe out whole communities. Earthquakes crush the centres of cities like Christchurch.
The list goes on. And for a significant number of people the daily deluge of death, destruction and bad news is overwhelming and influential in their thinking process. They create fears and concerns. Even where I live, 80m above sea level, my neighbours are asking what we would do if a tsunami hit.
For particular personality types, anxiety takes hold. And for some parents it takes a big effort to maintain a positive outlook in front of their kids who are equally vulnerable to the images they see.
And then there’s work
Add another layer: unexpected uncertainty, or sudden and alarming change at work, the place where many of us spend most of our waking hours.
Job losses, restructuring, current boss leaving, a new boss, new corporate direction or new government policy, revitalized competitors, new products, the demand for more margin and reduction in costs – add your own example to this list.
Do these work-based experiences also affect the way you make decisions and how you interact with people around you – of course they do.
Six decades ago
All these happenings remind me of the words of Franklin D Roosevelt in his Presidential Inauguration speech in 1933. Although the global context was different (then the world was in the grip of the Depression), that sense of feeling overwhelmed, fearful and hopeless was as palpable as some people are feeling today.
You’ll recall Roosevelt’s words:
“...let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyses needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.
Roosevelt was talking about the consequences of The Almond Effect® though I hadn’t described it as that yet – in fact my mother was only 3!
And his words are as relevant today
As David Ropeik says in his blog post about keeping perspective on the risks of nuclear power:
“As powerful a tool as our risk perception system is for keeping us safe in general, sometimes that instinctive/emotional system can get risk wrong, in dangerous ways.”
As you know, in our limbic system, the amygdala is responsible for our feelings of fear. It functions as a kind of psychological sentinel, scanning every situation with only one question in mind: could it harm me or not? It’s the basic survival mechanism that sets off our fight or flight mechanism.
It served us well when we were living on the savannah plains. The trouble is, it is still functioning in much the same way today.
But it is not rational thought that dictates our amygdala’s response. Rather it is an instantaneous prediction based on experiences, memories and concepts stored away over our whole lifetime from everything that happens in every minute that we live.
Fear can make a hash of our response to change or even options for consideration
Neurobiologists have shown, using fMRI and CT scans, that rational, logical decision-making is inextricably intertwined with emotions. In fact, human beings are primarily emotional and secondarily rational, so, without care, emotions call the shots in business and in life.
At work, people resist change because of their fears around job security and the unknown. Underpinning these fears are ANTs (automatic negative thoughts) that could include concerns about capability to learn new skills, previous failures, more work, more energy, having to develop new patterns and routine to name a few.
The role of the leader is pivotal
I’ve been conducting some research over many years about what people want from their leaders in times of change.
Here are a few of the items on the checklist:
* to feel included
* to be treated with respect
* the truth
* WIIFM and to know where they fit in
* proof that the changed approach will work
* clarity of objectives and goals
* reasons for the change
* picture of what success looks like
* acknowledgement of past efforts and skills
The challenge for leaders is that often they don’t know all the answers about the change and unless they are self-aware with honed self-management skills, their own ‘almonds’ and ANTs take over. Their own fears and anxieties, even subtle ones, make a hash of their ability to make decisions, communicate wisely and lead change.
Where do you fit in all this?
So let me ask you right now to stop and reflect: does fear get in your way either at work or beyond? If I asked you to write down a list of things that could be impacting you, what would you write?
To what extent are your responses to others, your actions and words driven by your own deliberate or subconscious survival instincts?
Are you a leader who is providing what your team needs and wants from you?
Ticking the boxes of the checklist above is a great place to start.
Radiation spews into the atmosphere in Japan. Floods in Australia cause drowning and destruction. People are butchered in countries ruled by dictators.
Tsunamis wipe out whole communities. Earthquakes crush the centres of cities like Christchurch.
The list goes on. And for a significant number of people the daily deluge of death, destruction and bad news is overwhelming and influential in their thinking process. They create fears and concerns. Even where I live, 80m above sea level, my neighbours are asking what we would do if a tsunami hit.
For particular personality types, anxiety takes hold. And for some parents it takes a big effort to maintain a positive outlook in front of their kids who are equally vulnerable to the images they see.
And then there’s work
Add another layer: unexpected uncertainty, or sudden and alarming change at work, the place where many of us spend most of our waking hours.
Job losses, restructuring, current boss leaving, a new boss, new corporate direction or new government policy, revitalized competitors, new products, the demand for more margin and reduction in costs – add your own example to this list.
Do these work-based experiences also affect the way you make decisions and how you interact with people around you – of course they do.
Six decades ago
All these happenings remind me of the words of Franklin D Roosevelt in his Presidential Inauguration speech in 1933. Although the global context was different (then the world was in the grip of the Depression), that sense of feeling overwhelmed, fearful and hopeless was as palpable as some people are feeling today.
You’ll recall Roosevelt’s words:
“...let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyses needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.
Roosevelt was talking about the consequences of The Almond Effect® though I hadn’t described it as that yet – in fact my mother was only 3!
And his words are as relevant today
As David Ropeik says in his blog post about keeping perspective on the risks of nuclear power:
“As powerful a tool as our risk perception system is for keeping us safe in general, sometimes that instinctive/emotional system can get risk wrong, in dangerous ways.”
As you know, in our limbic system, the amygdala is responsible for our feelings of fear. It functions as a kind of psychological sentinel, scanning every situation with only one question in mind: could it harm me or not? It’s the basic survival mechanism that sets off our fight or flight mechanism.
It served us well when we were living on the savannah plains. The trouble is, it is still functioning in much the same way today.
But it is not rational thought that dictates our amygdala’s response. Rather it is an instantaneous prediction based on experiences, memories and concepts stored away over our whole lifetime from everything that happens in every minute that we live.
Fear can make a hash of our response to change or even options for consideration
Neurobiologists have shown, using fMRI and CT scans, that rational, logical decision-making is inextricably intertwined with emotions. In fact, human beings are primarily emotional and secondarily rational, so, without care, emotions call the shots in business and in life.
At work, people resist change because of their fears around job security and the unknown. Underpinning these fears are ANTs (automatic negative thoughts) that could include concerns about capability to learn new skills, previous failures, more work, more energy, having to develop new patterns and routine to name a few.
The role of the leader is pivotal
I’ve been conducting some research over many years about what people want from their leaders in times of change.
Here are a few of the items on the checklist:
* to feel included
* to be treated with respect
* the truth
* WIIFM and to know where they fit in
* proof that the changed approach will work
* clarity of objectives and goals
* reasons for the change
* picture of what success looks like
* acknowledgement of past efforts and skills
The challenge for leaders is that often they don’t know all the answers about the change and unless they are self-aware with honed self-management skills, their own ‘almonds’ and ANTs take over. Their own fears and anxieties, even subtle ones, make a hash of their ability to make decisions, communicate wisely and lead change.
Where do you fit in all this?
So let me ask you right now to stop and reflect: does fear get in your way either at work or beyond? If I asked you to write down a list of things that could be impacting you, what would you write?
To what extent are your responses to others, your actions and words driven by your own deliberate or subconscious survival instincts?
Are you a leader who is providing what your team needs and wants from you?
Ticking the boxes of the checklist above is a great place to start.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
I own you
Watching TV the other night, I gazed in disbelief as the Superintendent of a police station yelled at his people:
“I own you – I don’t care what you think. Just do as I (expletive deleted!) tell you.”
I was staggered. Even though it was just a show on the tele, do bosses still do that? Is that the way they think you get the best out of people?
I checked when the program was made – 2010. It’s usually a good program and the story line mostly believable – but did the scriptwriter base this manager’s behaviour in reality?
What do you think? Have you or do you experience this behaviour from your bosses? If you do, click here and tell me about it - I'd really love to know.
Exploring the House of Wonders
It made me think of a place I visited last month in Stonetown, Zanzibar – the House of Wonders.
It’s called that because it was the first building in Zanzibar to have electricity, and also the first building in East Africa to have an elevator...
]
... which wasn’t working like mostly everything in Tanzania.
]
In the House of Wonders there are many exhibits on Swahili culture, including a finely carved Drum.
Here's a photo (sorry about the quality) of the explanation of the carvings on the Drum.
]
As you can see, it says that the Drum is an ancient Swahili insignia of power.
One of the inscriptions reads:
"Your action is a reflection of your leadership.
So call all the people together, including those who behave differently,
for the wise gathers all and satisfies them."
Clearly the Super on the tele hadn’t read that inscription.
What does motivate people?
Nor had the Super read what Dr Dean Mobbs, a Senior Investigator Scientist at the MRC-Cognitive and Brain Sciences Unit at Cambridge University UK says about the latest neuroscientific research on the mechanics of Motivation.
And the Super would not be alone. Most performance reviews systems have been designed without reference to what the neuroscientists are telling us.
I cause many an HR practitioner to raise their eyebrows when I suggest that most Performance Management systems emphasise the wrong thing.
Focus on performance that ‘has room for improvement’ or whatever muddying words the form might say, often engenders anxiety, even fear, for the recipient of such news, especially if salaries or promotions explicitly or implicitly depend on the Review.
And while it’s true that getting this feedback might induce short-term improvement, it’s unlikely to result in sustained motivation and commitment. The employee is more likely to be engaged in looking for a job elsewhere.
Our social brain is the driver
The research points to what is becoming more and more evident through Mobbs’ and other’s findings (and our own everyday lived experience) that the social environment is one of the most powerful contributors to how we perform.
I don’t mean how many morning teas we go to or drinks after work.
Rather if our workplace and the behaviours of others in it, appeals to the affiliation and feedback aspects of our social brain, we are more likely to try harder to consistently deliver up a good performance.
That’s because, for example as Mobbs says, when we:
* see those in our ‘in-group’ win
* help others and give advice
* work in a team
* hear people say nice things about us
the reward system in our brain is activated.
And we like to feel good, so we do more of whatever brings on that feeling.
Do you have leaders or troglodytes?
It is very easy to get seduced by the ‘system’ of Performance Management.
But like all change management strategies, if you want to bring about change, you need to focus on the benefit (the WIFM),the upsides for people to change their, often habitual, ways of doing things.
Our brains are hardwired to focus on things that scare us first – that’s The Almond Effect® in action – to make sure we take steps to survive.
But at work, life/death is not usually the issue – a positive environment and happiness is. Without them, employees and especially your best ones, simply go elsewhere for a job.
While many organisations are changing the structure and intent underpinning their performance management systems, you still need good leaders, not troglodytes like the TV Super, to implement them.
It’s a key leadership skill that is pivotal to motivating your people to perform to the best of their ability. And crucial to them being willing to change the way they do things.
So reflect for a moment: what does your performance management system emphasise and how well do your managers bring out the best in their teams?
And are you making sure that your organisation is utilizing the best means available to maximize the organisation’s results?
“I own you – I don’t care what you think. Just do as I (expletive deleted!) tell you.”
I was staggered. Even though it was just a show on the tele, do bosses still do that? Is that the way they think you get the best out of people?
I checked when the program was made – 2010. It’s usually a good program and the story line mostly believable – but did the scriptwriter base this manager’s behaviour in reality?
What do you think? Have you or do you experience this behaviour from your bosses? If you do, click here and tell me about it - I'd really love to know.
Exploring the House of Wonders
It made me think of a place I visited last month in Stonetown, Zanzibar – the House of Wonders.
It’s called that because it was the first building in Zanzibar to have electricity, and also the first building in East Africa to have an elevator...
]... which wasn’t working like mostly everything in Tanzania.
]In the House of Wonders there are many exhibits on Swahili culture, including a finely carved Drum.
Here's a photo (sorry about the quality) of the explanation of the carvings on the Drum.
]As you can see, it says that the Drum is an ancient Swahili insignia of power.
One of the inscriptions reads:
"Your action is a reflection of your leadership.
So call all the people together, including those who behave differently,
for the wise gathers all and satisfies them."
Clearly the Super on the tele hadn’t read that inscription.
What does motivate people?
Nor had the Super read what Dr Dean Mobbs, a Senior Investigator Scientist at the MRC-Cognitive and Brain Sciences Unit at Cambridge University UK says about the latest neuroscientific research on the mechanics of Motivation.
And the Super would not be alone. Most performance reviews systems have been designed without reference to what the neuroscientists are telling us.
I cause many an HR practitioner to raise their eyebrows when I suggest that most Performance Management systems emphasise the wrong thing.
Focus on performance that ‘has room for improvement’ or whatever muddying words the form might say, often engenders anxiety, even fear, for the recipient of such news, especially if salaries or promotions explicitly or implicitly depend on the Review.
And while it’s true that getting this feedback might induce short-term improvement, it’s unlikely to result in sustained motivation and commitment. The employee is more likely to be engaged in looking for a job elsewhere.
Our social brain is the driver
The research points to what is becoming more and more evident through Mobbs’ and other’s findings (and our own everyday lived experience) that the social environment is one of the most powerful contributors to how we perform.
I don’t mean how many morning teas we go to or drinks after work.
Rather if our workplace and the behaviours of others in it, appeals to the affiliation and feedback aspects of our social brain, we are more likely to try harder to consistently deliver up a good performance.
That’s because, for example as Mobbs says, when we:
* see those in our ‘in-group’ win
* help others and give advice
* work in a team
* hear people say nice things about us
the reward system in our brain is activated.
And we like to feel good, so we do more of whatever brings on that feeling.
Do you have leaders or troglodytes?
It is very easy to get seduced by the ‘system’ of Performance Management.
But like all change management strategies, if you want to bring about change, you need to focus on the benefit (the WIFM),the upsides for people to change their, often habitual, ways of doing things.
Our brains are hardwired to focus on things that scare us first – that’s The Almond Effect® in action – to make sure we take steps to survive.
But at work, life/death is not usually the issue – a positive environment and happiness is. Without them, employees and especially your best ones, simply go elsewhere for a job.
While many organisations are changing the structure and intent underpinning their performance management systems, you still need good leaders, not troglodytes like the TV Super, to implement them.
It’s a key leadership skill that is pivotal to motivating your people to perform to the best of their ability. And crucial to them being willing to change the way they do things.
So reflect for a moment: what does your performance management system emphasise and how well do your managers bring out the best in their teams?
And are you making sure that your organisation is utilizing the best means available to maximize the organisation’s results?
Friday, February 18, 2011
Do you worry about living up to expectations?
You may be a successful manager or competent team member with lots of runs on the board. Your future career is looking good.
But even so, do you still experience moments of doubt? Do you ask yourself: ‘Am I good enough for this role?’ 'Will I stuff this up because I’m not ready for it?'
Or even this: “!@#^!----i shouldn't have taken this on - I’m in way over my head!
And are you reluctant to ask for help because you think you’re expected to have the answers and that others will think less of you if you don’t?
Do you get annoyed because people assume you’re too young for the responsibility, or perhaps too old?
Do you wonder where the fearlessness you had in earlier times has gone to?
Are you limiting your career prospects?
If you answered yes to any of those questions, you may be on track to sabotage your potential!
Linda Hill and Kent Lineback, their Jan/Feb 2011 Harvard Business Review article say this:
Such moments of doubt and even fear may and often do come despite years of management experience. Any number of events can trigger them.
They go on:
Most bosses reach a certain level of proficiency and stop there ...too many derail and fail to live up to their potential. Why? Because they stop working on themselves.
It’s The Almond Effect® at work
When we are new to our roles we are constantly on the lookout for derailers, things that can go wrong. But over time, as we become more settled and comfortable in the role, we worry far less. In some cases, complacency sets in.
But then something triggers off the doubts, the niggles, the concerns, the worries about self-competence and capability.
It can come out of the blue or simply be the result of too much to do, too little time or too many other stressors in your life.
And these derailers come from past experiences and events where things haven’t gone as planned either for you or you have seen it happen to others.
Over our lives, a huge number of these warning signs get stored in our brain which if we haven’t mastered the STAR technique, can show up at any time with miserable results.
Can you eliminate the triggers?
Because those triggers are always there, you have two choices: eliminate them or learn techniques to manage them before they control you.
So can you eliminate them?
There is a lot of research into this, particularly in the context of post-traumatic stress syndrome. What a relief it would be for sufferers if the traumatic memories could be eradicated.
There is no commercially available means to do this at present. And if there was, the ethical questions would be enormous? For example, could someone who goes through a divorce have the memory of their previous spouse erased?
You may have seen the romantic drama film Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) where this was attempted!
The challenge is that if you delete a memory, you delete a part of someone’s life. And learning from our past experiences is the way that humans learn and grow.
Neuroscience not Hollywood
Neuroscientists are making progress towards techniques to selectively master that part of our brain, our amygdala, whose sole job is to ensure our survival. It does this by recording all the times when we have been under threat and letting us know or warning us when the same or similar situation is happening again.
Drs. Roger Clem and Richard Huganir most recent study on this has expounded on earlier work (e.g. by Joseph Le Doux) that there is a window of opportunity when memories can be ‘de-potentiated’.
Clem and Huganir discovered in mice that readily removable receptors (the main chemical sensors that detect messages sent from neuron to neuron in the amygdala) are only present for a few days after inducing fear, and peak at around one day.
So if the same thing happens in humans, this may well provide a window of opportunity for removal of the fear inducing receptors. And hey presto, bad memory gone.
However as you can see this is fraught with what ifs, hurdles and obstacles before it can become a reality. Does the same thing happen in humans? How long is the window of opportunity? How finely can we pinpoint the memory? What are the side effects of any drug or physical intervention to name just a few.
And then there are ethical dilemmas, too many to start on in this CLUES.
You need your amygdala
You may have read about the case of SM who experienced such damage to her amygdala that was associated not only with a decrease in the experience of fear, but the absence of fear altogether.
There is a Catch 22 of course. As the authors (Feinstein et al) of the study note:
“The unique case of patient SM provides a rare glimpse into the adverse consequences of living life without the amygdala. For SM, the consequences have been severe. Her behavior, time and time again, leads her back to the very situations she should be avoiding, highlighting the indispensable role that the amygdala plays in promoting survival by compelling the organism away from danger. Indeed, it appears that without the amygdala, the evolutionary value of fear is lost.”
The only remedy now
So until such time as the memory specific neuro-pharmaceuticals are as available as Xanax or Ativan, the best way to control your career derailers is to learn techniques such as mindfulness and STAR – Stop Think Act Rewire.
They are going to be far more use to you in the short term and enable you to be the great manager and team member you can be.
But even so, do you still experience moments of doubt? Do you ask yourself: ‘Am I good enough for this role?’ 'Will I stuff this up because I’m not ready for it?'
Or even this: “!@#^!----i shouldn't have taken this on - I’m in way over my head!
And are you reluctant to ask for help because you think you’re expected to have the answers and that others will think less of you if you don’t?
Do you get annoyed because people assume you’re too young for the responsibility, or perhaps too old?
Do you wonder where the fearlessness you had in earlier times has gone to?
Are you limiting your career prospects?
If you answered yes to any of those questions, you may be on track to sabotage your potential!
Linda Hill and Kent Lineback, their Jan/Feb 2011 Harvard Business Review article say this:
Such moments of doubt and even fear may and often do come despite years of management experience. Any number of events can trigger them.
They go on:
Most bosses reach a certain level of proficiency and stop there ...too many derail and fail to live up to their potential. Why? Because they stop working on themselves.
It’s The Almond Effect® at work
When we are new to our roles we are constantly on the lookout for derailers, things that can go wrong. But over time, as we become more settled and comfortable in the role, we worry far less. In some cases, complacency sets in.
But then something triggers off the doubts, the niggles, the concerns, the worries about self-competence and capability.
It can come out of the blue or simply be the result of too much to do, too little time or too many other stressors in your life.
And these derailers come from past experiences and events where things haven’t gone as planned either for you or you have seen it happen to others.
Over our lives, a huge number of these warning signs get stored in our brain which if we haven’t mastered the STAR technique, can show up at any time with miserable results.
Can you eliminate the triggers?
Because those triggers are always there, you have two choices: eliminate them or learn techniques to manage them before they control you.
So can you eliminate them?
There is a lot of research into this, particularly in the context of post-traumatic stress syndrome. What a relief it would be for sufferers if the traumatic memories could be eradicated.
There is no commercially available means to do this at present. And if there was, the ethical questions would be enormous? For example, could someone who goes through a divorce have the memory of their previous spouse erased?
You may have seen the romantic drama film Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) where this was attempted!
The challenge is that if you delete a memory, you delete a part of someone’s life. And learning from our past experiences is the way that humans learn and grow.
Neuroscience not Hollywood
Neuroscientists are making progress towards techniques to selectively master that part of our brain, our amygdala, whose sole job is to ensure our survival. It does this by recording all the times when we have been under threat and letting us know or warning us when the same or similar situation is happening again.
Drs. Roger Clem and Richard Huganir most recent study on this has expounded on earlier work (e.g. by Joseph Le Doux) that there is a window of opportunity when memories can be ‘de-potentiated’.
Clem and Huganir discovered in mice that readily removable receptors (the main chemical sensors that detect messages sent from neuron to neuron in the amygdala) are only present for a few days after inducing fear, and peak at around one day.
So if the same thing happens in humans, this may well provide a window of opportunity for removal of the fear inducing receptors. And hey presto, bad memory gone.
However as you can see this is fraught with what ifs, hurdles and obstacles before it can become a reality. Does the same thing happen in humans? How long is the window of opportunity? How finely can we pinpoint the memory? What are the side effects of any drug or physical intervention to name just a few.
And then there are ethical dilemmas, too many to start on in this CLUES.
You need your amygdala
You may have read about the case of SM who experienced such damage to her amygdala that was associated not only with a decrease in the experience of fear, but the absence of fear altogether.
There is a Catch 22 of course. As the authors (Feinstein et al) of the study note:
“The unique case of patient SM provides a rare glimpse into the adverse consequences of living life without the amygdala. For SM, the consequences have been severe. Her behavior, time and time again, leads her back to the very situations she should be avoiding, highlighting the indispensable role that the amygdala plays in promoting survival by compelling the organism away from danger. Indeed, it appears that without the amygdala, the evolutionary value of fear is lost.”
The only remedy now
So until such time as the memory specific neuro-pharmaceuticals are as available as Xanax or Ativan, the best way to control your career derailers is to learn techniques such as mindfulness and STAR – Stop Think Act Rewire.
They are going to be far more use to you in the short term and enable you to be the great manager and team member you can be.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Office Politics - ignore them at your peril
“Feeling resentment is like taking poison yourself and waiting for the other person to die.”
Ponder those words. They are gold. Many have been credited with them but whoever said them originally was truly insightful.
How much resentment do you harbour? Especially at work. Is it harming the other person or just you?
Resentment causes heaps of stress yet so much stress at work is avoidable.
How? By understanding and dealing with the emotions and feelings that underpin office politics and developing an approach to minimise their negative impact on you.
I hate office politics
Many people say they don’t want to be involved in office politics. Is that you? Do you say ‘I loathe the politics’, ‘I avoid politics’, ‘I refuse to play politics?
If you do, that’s the equivalent of committing organisational suicide.
And if you are a manager, paying too much or too little attention to office politics means you had better start looking at the jobs vacant ads.
Poor engagement, increased internal competition, conflict, withholding of knowledge and information, lack of innovation, missed strategic opportunities, reduced productivity – these are just a few of the ramifications of not attending to negative political behaviour.
And we haven’t even begun to talk about the impact on health, morale, trust and faith in the leaders.
So what’s at the core of office politics?
Self-preservation. Survival in the corporate jungle. Protecting your status and resources. Mimicking the behaviours of others to get the results you want for yourself.
Here are some examples of office behaviour that people shared with me recently:
* ‘Blatant favouritism/nepotism displayed by the 'leader' of the team’
* ‘Taking credit for something they did not do’
* ‘Manager using aggressive language to intimidate others to achieve own agenda’
* ‘People are afraid to speak up & voice their true opinion at risk of losing their jobs’
* ‘Power play within management affecting the success of the project’
* ‘Insecure boss trying to dodge criticism by lying about his staff’
* ‘Non-communication of important information’
* ‘Bullying, intimidation, spreading untrue rumours’
* ‘Pitting employees against other employees’
* ‘Denial of involvement in something that didn't go as expected’
* ‘Instructed to withhold information from Board’
Why do we do it?
We have to go back to the era of hominids to understand why people continue to engage in back-stabbing, manipulation and the ‘dark side’ of engaging with others; why people still become fearful, anxious, suspicious and cynical.
As you know, I call it The Almond Effect®. It’s when our inbuilt human survival system mistakes what other people are doing in the office for an ambush of sabre-tooth tigers.
So we react biologically to the threat as if the people were killer animals - though we modify our behaviour to fit the work environment.
We respond with anger, gossip, poor performance, back-chatting, presenteeism and withdrawal of discretionary labour. We close our doors, roll our eyes, miss meetings, deliver poor customer service and challenge everything the boss wants us to change.
It’s hard to believe that human relationships have not evolved since the era of Neanderthals. But we clearly haven’t in some regards.
Tips to survive in the office jungle
Understanding and managing The Almond Effect® - it drives much of office politics - is the critical first step in successfully navigating your way through your organisation’s political environment.
That and some other important strategies to shore up your career.
Here are some:
If you are a manager:
* Examine your own contribution – ask yourself: ‘what would it be like to work for me?’
* Set the standard and walk your talk
* Do not tolerate bad behaviour even from your most productive people
* Delegate effectively and don't meddle
* Ensure accountability goes with responsibility
* Create psychological safety for your people to talk to you
And as an employee:
* Performance is not enough – you also need EQ
* Inter-personal relationship skills are essential
* Check: Are you consciously/ subconsciously a contributor to office politics?
* Manage your emotional brain
* Build credibility through visibility and integrity, not negativity
* Grow your networks
* Manage upwards
* Maintain perspective: fight only the battles that count and let stuff go
Ponder those words. They are gold. Many have been credited with them but whoever said them originally was truly insightful.
How much resentment do you harbour? Especially at work. Is it harming the other person or just you?
Resentment causes heaps of stress yet so much stress at work is avoidable.
How? By understanding and dealing with the emotions and feelings that underpin office politics and developing an approach to minimise their negative impact on you.
I hate office politics
Many people say they don’t want to be involved in office politics. Is that you? Do you say ‘I loathe the politics’, ‘I avoid politics’, ‘I refuse to play politics?
If you do, that’s the equivalent of committing organisational suicide.
And if you are a manager, paying too much or too little attention to office politics means you had better start looking at the jobs vacant ads.
Poor engagement, increased internal competition, conflict, withholding of knowledge and information, lack of innovation, missed strategic opportunities, reduced productivity – these are just a few of the ramifications of not attending to negative political behaviour.
And we haven’t even begun to talk about the impact on health, morale, trust and faith in the leaders.
So what’s at the core of office politics?
Self-preservation. Survival in the corporate jungle. Protecting your status and resources. Mimicking the behaviours of others to get the results you want for yourself.
Here are some examples of office behaviour that people shared with me recently:
* ‘Blatant favouritism/nepotism displayed by the 'leader' of the team’
* ‘Taking credit for something they did not do’
* ‘Manager using aggressive language to intimidate others to achieve own agenda’
* ‘People are afraid to speak up & voice their true opinion at risk of losing their jobs’
* ‘Power play within management affecting the success of the project’
* ‘Insecure boss trying to dodge criticism by lying about his staff’
* ‘Non-communication of important information’
* ‘Bullying, intimidation, spreading untrue rumours’
* ‘Pitting employees against other employees’
* ‘Denial of involvement in something that didn't go as expected’
* ‘Instructed to withhold information from Board’
Why do we do it?
We have to go back to the era of hominids to understand why people continue to engage in back-stabbing, manipulation and the ‘dark side’ of engaging with others; why people still become fearful, anxious, suspicious and cynical.
As you know, I call it The Almond Effect®. It’s when our inbuilt human survival system mistakes what other people are doing in the office for an ambush of sabre-tooth tigers.
So we react biologically to the threat as if the people were killer animals - though we modify our behaviour to fit the work environment.
We respond with anger, gossip, poor performance, back-chatting, presenteeism and withdrawal of discretionary labour. We close our doors, roll our eyes, miss meetings, deliver poor customer service and challenge everything the boss wants us to change.
It’s hard to believe that human relationships have not evolved since the era of Neanderthals. But we clearly haven’t in some regards.
Tips to survive in the office jungle
Understanding and managing The Almond Effect® - it drives much of office politics - is the critical first step in successfully navigating your way through your organisation’s political environment.
That and some other important strategies to shore up your career.
Here are some:
If you are a manager:
* Examine your own contribution – ask yourself: ‘what would it be like to work for me?’
* Set the standard and walk your talk
* Do not tolerate bad behaviour even from your most productive people
* Delegate effectively and don't meddle
* Ensure accountability goes with responsibility
* Create psychological safety for your people to talk to you
And as an employee:
* Performance is not enough – you also need EQ
* Inter-personal relationship skills are essential
* Check: Are you consciously/ subconsciously a contributor to office politics?
* Manage your emotional brain
* Build credibility through visibility and integrity, not negativity
* Grow your networks
* Manage upwards
* Maintain perspective: fight only the battles that count and let stuff go
Friday, December 17, 2010
She broke my heart
You damage your health if you don't have social relationships according to Matt Liebermann.
At the 2010 Mind and Its Potential Conference, Liebermann said the damage was equivalent to smoking two packs of cigarettes a day.
In fact, he said, sociality is not an accident – it is ancient and by design.
We had and still have a much better chance of survival if we are not alone.
It still holds true today
Think of how animals hunt – they search for and pounce on the loner, the one separated from the group.
And reflect on the language we use as we encourage people to sign up to our point of view or pitch: “there’s strength in numbers”; “we can’t go this alone”.
Consider also the stories of babies who don’t thrive when they are deprived of social connection. Click here for one commentary that reflects on what happens.
Amygdala can’t tell the difference
So if sociality is critical to our survival, perhaps that’s the explanation why our amygdala can’t tell the difference between social pain and a threat to our physical existence.
The Almond Effect® is all about that – our bodies jumping into survival mode, fight, flight, flock or freeze, when our amygdala perceive an emotional or mental threat (e.g. your boss’s raised voice, an irate customer, the exclusion by the team, running late for a critical meeting), yet none of these are likely to result in us being wounded or injured physically.
The way we talk about social pain reinforces our amygdala’s inability to discriminate. We use the language of physical pain: “She broke my heart, you hurt my feelings, I’m gutted.”
Learn to accept the things you can't change
There are many tools we can use to manage the social pain we feel, The Almond Effect®, both at work and beyond.
One critical tool for me is the use of acceptance.
So for example, one of the best ways to deal with ongoing challenges at work, is to accept that work will never be completely harmonious and free from irritations and politics. To believe it will, is simply living in a false reality.
I came across these words ascribed to Fr Alfred D’Szouza. They sit above my desk and I reflect upon them daily to help me accept and deal with social pain and my ‘almonds’. I hope you find them useful too.
For a long time it had seemed to me
That life was about to begin – real life;
But there was always some obstacle
in the way.
Something to be got through first.
Some unfinished business,
time still to be served,
a debt to be paid.
Then life would begin.
At last it dawned on me
that these obstacles were my life.
Then you can move on
In other words, once you have accepted the situation, you can do something about it.
There will be more about strategies on how to do that in future CLUES.
At the 2010 Mind and Its Potential Conference, Liebermann said the damage was equivalent to smoking two packs of cigarettes a day.
In fact, he said, sociality is not an accident – it is ancient and by design.
We had and still have a much better chance of survival if we are not alone.
It still holds true today
Think of how animals hunt – they search for and pounce on the loner, the one separated from the group.
And reflect on the language we use as we encourage people to sign up to our point of view or pitch: “there’s strength in numbers”; “we can’t go this alone”.
Consider also the stories of babies who don’t thrive when they are deprived of social connection. Click here for one commentary that reflects on what happens.
Amygdala can’t tell the difference
So if sociality is critical to our survival, perhaps that’s the explanation why our amygdala can’t tell the difference between social pain and a threat to our physical existence.
The Almond Effect® is all about that – our bodies jumping into survival mode, fight, flight, flock or freeze, when our amygdala perceive an emotional or mental threat (e.g. your boss’s raised voice, an irate customer, the exclusion by the team, running late for a critical meeting), yet none of these are likely to result in us being wounded or injured physically.
The way we talk about social pain reinforces our amygdala’s inability to discriminate. We use the language of physical pain: “She broke my heart, you hurt my feelings, I’m gutted.”
Learn to accept the things you can't change
There are many tools we can use to manage the social pain we feel, The Almond Effect®, both at work and beyond.
One critical tool for me is the use of acceptance.
So for example, one of the best ways to deal with ongoing challenges at work, is to accept that work will never be completely harmonious and free from irritations and politics. To believe it will, is simply living in a false reality.
I came across these words ascribed to Fr Alfred D’Szouza. They sit above my desk and I reflect upon them daily to help me accept and deal with social pain and my ‘almonds’. I hope you find them useful too.
For a long time it had seemed to me
That life was about to begin – real life;
But there was always some obstacle
in the way.
Something to be got through first.
Some unfinished business,
time still to be served,
a debt to be paid.
Then life would begin.
At last it dawned on me
that these obstacles were my life.
Then you can move on
In other words, once you have accepted the situation, you can do something about it.
There will be more about strategies on how to do that in future CLUES.
Wednesday, December 01, 2010
Geoff Huegill triumphs over depression
Do you feel uncomfortable talking to a colleague about their mental wellbeing?
Why are we so fearful to ask someone if they are OK? Or to say that we notice that they seem a bit down and is there is something they'd like to talk to you about?
We don't hesitate if they have a sniffle, a limp or a black eye. But a concern about someone's mental state is often too hot to handle.
We usually tell ourselves that it is none of our business. Or "what if I open up a can of worms?"
Of course it's your amygdala talking, The Almond Effect, holding you back because it's feeling threatened about what a well meaning question might lead to.
Each year, undiagnosed depression in the workplace costs $4.3 billion in lost productivity and this excludes Workcover/insurance claims, part-time or casual employees, retrenchment, recruitment and training.
In addition to absenteeism, depression accounts for more than 12 million days of reduced productivity each year.
The World Health Organization expects Depression to be the second leading cause of disability after heart disease by 2020
But depression can be overcome. And you can play a part in that recovery by not being afraid to have the conversation.
This is all leading me to say warmest congratulations to Geoff Huegill who was awarded 2010 Sports Performer of the Year.
Geoff has experienced depression. He talks about it - a key strategy.
Another of his strategies to overcome depression was exercise - and his reward was to win the Gold Medal in the 100 metre butterfly at the Commonwealth Games and another in the 4 by 100m relay!
Geoff is an Ambassador for the Black Dog Institute, the same organisation for which I am a volunteer Community Education Presenter on Depression and Bipolar Disorder.
He also has a great smile (and abs!)
Don't let The Almond Effect stop you lending an ear to the 1 in 5 Australians who suffer, sometimes in a very lonely way, from this very common challenge. The person you talk to may not win a Commonwealth Gold Medal but be assured that they would want to give you one.
Why are we so fearful to ask someone if they are OK? Or to say that we notice that they seem a bit down and is there is something they'd like to talk to you about?
We don't hesitate if they have a sniffle, a limp or a black eye. But a concern about someone's mental state is often too hot to handle.
We usually tell ourselves that it is none of our business. Or "what if I open up a can of worms?"
Of course it's your amygdala talking, The Almond Effect, holding you back because it's feeling threatened about what a well meaning question might lead to.
Each year, undiagnosed depression in the workplace costs $4.3 billion in lost productivity and this excludes Workcover/insurance claims, part-time or casual employees, retrenchment, recruitment and training.
In addition to absenteeism, depression accounts for more than 12 million days of reduced productivity each year.
The World Health Organization expects Depression to be the second leading cause of disability after heart disease by 2020
But depression can be overcome. And you can play a part in that recovery by not being afraid to have the conversation.
This is all leading me to say warmest congratulations to Geoff Huegill who was awarded 2010 Sports Performer of the Year.
Geoff has experienced depression. He talks about it - a key strategy.
Another of his strategies to overcome depression was exercise - and his reward was to win the Gold Medal in the 100 metre butterfly at the Commonwealth Games and another in the 4 by 100m relay!
Geoff is an Ambassador for the Black Dog Institute, the same organisation for which I am a volunteer Community Education Presenter on Depression and Bipolar Disorder.
He also has a great smile (and abs!)
Don't let The Almond Effect stop you lending an ear to the 1 in 5 Australians who suffer, sometimes in a very lonely way, from this very common challenge. The person you talk to may not win a Commonwealth Gold Medal but be assured that they would want to give you one.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Why Don't you quit your job?
Well, why don't you??
Sorry – only joking!
But seriously, how many of you want to quit your job and get another but are procrastinating for some reason?
“It’s not the right time, I’ve just come back from leave, they were really understanding when my mother died, they were generous when we had our baby, I don’t want to let my team down, I’d feel like a rat leaving a sinking ship. What would I do? What else can I do? I’m too old or not old enough, haven’t got enough experience, am overqualified, they paid for my Masters, my boss would bad mouth me etc. I will do it soon.”
Any of those phrases resonate with you? Any of them come from you?
Why are you holding back?
The problem with suffering this dilemma is that you are probably unhappy, getting grumpy with your family, are dissatisfied with what you are achieving, hate going to work, feeling stressed and tense and not performing in your job to the best of your ability.
In the worst case scenarios, you could end up alienating the people at work who you want to ask to give you a reference or even precipitate some performance management counselling. At the least you are increasing your chances of a stress induced illness.
What’s holding you back?
It’s probably The Almond Effect® - your inbuilt human survival system is mistaking the thought of changing jobs for an ambush of sabre-tooth tigers and showing up as avoidance, delay, excuses – in other words, you’re resisting change and finding plenty of valid reasons to do so. Is that you?
Have you changed jobs before?
If you’ve moved on to other roles in the past, please think about how that worked out.
You might have been unlucky and it was not a good move. If that is the case, then the STAR suggestions are definitely for you.
If you have successfully changed jobs in the past, then in addition to STAR, think about what is the same about your current situation and what is different?
What was good about the previous move? What wasn’t? What were you afraid of then, if anything, and how is that different to this time? What can you build on out of that past experience?
Use the STAR approach to sort this out
Stop: You have to find a circuit breaker to stop the worry words from dominating your thought process.
Curiously the best way to do this is to focus on the feelings you have and put a name to what you actually are experiencing.
I have created two Wordles to help you choose the words: one is of positive emotion words and the other of negative ones.
Naming your emotion calms down your amygdala and engages your pre-frontal cortex.
Then you can...
Think: Once you’ve put your ‘almonds’ on hold, now think carefully about why you are feeling the way you are.
What evidence is there to say that the feeling is justified? If there is evidence, how much have you developed personally since the last time?
Considerably I am sure and now you are much better able to manage the situation and any negative impacts that you went through last time you changed jobs.
You stand a better chance of managing your emotions if you ...
Act: Take some steps. Set aside time to update your resume. Let me know if you would like the name of someone who can help you with this.
Next, cut out or print some job ads that could interest you. Study them and highlight the parts of the job that really interest you, that you can already do and the parts that would challenge you. Make sure there are plenty of the latter.
Then start applying.
Rewire: Every time you have either an interview that doesn’t go so well or a ‘not at this time’ note, review what you are doing well and what you can do differently.
If you take the time to do this and focus on thinking about and repeating the actions that are working for you, you’ll strengthen those new synaptic connections which will make the whole change job process easier each time.
You can’t erase the fear yet
Neuroscientists are getting closer every day to understanding how our amygdalae work and how it will be possible to eradicate bad memories.
When they can do that, we’ll have the ethical question about whether we can have some neuro-cosmetic intervention to allow us to selectively inhibit our responses to certain stimuli.
Until then, if you are unhappy in your job or simply need to move on for more experience, more money and/or a fresh challenge, don’t let The Almond Effect® stop you.
It evolved for us to stave off real predators not the ones you imagine will jump out at you when you hand in your notice.
Sorry – only joking!
But seriously, how many of you want to quit your job and get another but are procrastinating for some reason?
“It’s not the right time, I’ve just come back from leave, they were really understanding when my mother died, they were generous when we had our baby, I don’t want to let my team down, I’d feel like a rat leaving a sinking ship. What would I do? What else can I do? I’m too old or not old enough, haven’t got enough experience, am overqualified, they paid for my Masters, my boss would bad mouth me etc. I will do it soon.”
Any of those phrases resonate with you? Any of them come from you?
Why are you holding back?
The problem with suffering this dilemma is that you are probably unhappy, getting grumpy with your family, are dissatisfied with what you are achieving, hate going to work, feeling stressed and tense and not performing in your job to the best of your ability.
In the worst case scenarios, you could end up alienating the people at work who you want to ask to give you a reference or even precipitate some performance management counselling. At the least you are increasing your chances of a stress induced illness.
What’s holding you back?
It’s probably The Almond Effect® - your inbuilt human survival system is mistaking the thought of changing jobs for an ambush of sabre-tooth tigers and showing up as avoidance, delay, excuses – in other words, you’re resisting change and finding plenty of valid reasons to do so. Is that you?
Have you changed jobs before?
If you’ve moved on to other roles in the past, please think about how that worked out.
You might have been unlucky and it was not a good move. If that is the case, then the STAR suggestions are definitely for you.
If you have successfully changed jobs in the past, then in addition to STAR, think about what is the same about your current situation and what is different?
What was good about the previous move? What wasn’t? What were you afraid of then, if anything, and how is that different to this time? What can you build on out of that past experience?
Use the STAR approach to sort this out
Stop: You have to find a circuit breaker to stop the worry words from dominating your thought process.
Curiously the best way to do this is to focus on the feelings you have and put a name to what you actually are experiencing.
I have created two Wordles to help you choose the words: one is of positive emotion words and the other of negative ones.
Naming your emotion calms down your amygdala and engages your pre-frontal cortex.
Then you can...
Think: Once you’ve put your ‘almonds’ on hold, now think carefully about why you are feeling the way you are.
What evidence is there to say that the feeling is justified? If there is evidence, how much have you developed personally since the last time?
Considerably I am sure and now you are much better able to manage the situation and any negative impacts that you went through last time you changed jobs.
You stand a better chance of managing your emotions if you ...
Act: Take some steps. Set aside time to update your resume. Let me know if you would like the name of someone who can help you with this.
Next, cut out or print some job ads that could interest you. Study them and highlight the parts of the job that really interest you, that you can already do and the parts that would challenge you. Make sure there are plenty of the latter.
Then start applying.
Rewire: Every time you have either an interview that doesn’t go so well or a ‘not at this time’ note, review what you are doing well and what you can do differently.
If you take the time to do this and focus on thinking about and repeating the actions that are working for you, you’ll strengthen those new synaptic connections which will make the whole change job process easier each time.
You can’t erase the fear yet
Neuroscientists are getting closer every day to understanding how our amygdalae work and how it will be possible to eradicate bad memories.
When they can do that, we’ll have the ethical question about whether we can have some neuro-cosmetic intervention to allow us to selectively inhibit our responses to certain stimuli.
Until then, if you are unhappy in your job or simply need to move on for more experience, more money and/or a fresh challenge, don’t let The Almond Effect® stop you.
It evolved for us to stave off real predators not the ones you imagine will jump out at you when you hand in your notice.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Don't do your Inbox
What do you do first when you get to work? Do you go straight to your email or do you start on the toughest project that you have to do?
Most of us open the Inbox.
And there’s a good reason why.
Other than the size of it, usually an Inbox is low threat. It needs nowhere near as much brain energy as the big project and we get an instant sense of satisfaction as we delete, delete, delete and clear lots of messages.
And if you ever near the bottom of your inbox – wow, now that’s a buzz.
Your amygdala prefers the Inbox
But why do we do things in that order? You guessed it; it’s The Almond Effect®. We put off the demanding projects because there is much more riding on it than clearing the Inbox.
The project is demanding - we have to focus, concentrate, solve problems and create solutions. And that’s stressful.
In other words, your amygdala senses the project as a threat (The Almond Effect®) so to avoid the threat, you do the non-threatening things first i.e. your Inbox.
Brain drain
The problem with that approach is that even though you are taking the relatively unstressful course of doing your email, you are using up brain energy leaving you less fresh to handle the project when you’ve got no other reason to procrastinate.
Now our brains only have so much capacity before the glucose runs low and our ability to think clearly and innovatively is compromised. Then we have to take a rest and eat or drink sugar.
And our brains will naturally channel our activities to save brain energy where possible – not only is it hard work to use the working memory in our brain but we might need the energy for later when the sabre-tooth tiger appears in our office or home :)
The same thing happens when we need to change – ourselves or others. We put it off because our amygdala senses a threat i.e. it's The Almond Effect®. Unless we think about it and alter the course of action, our brain will guide us to less challenging things first. And before you know it, the day’s simply disappeared and it’s time to go home!
How was your day?
So think about your day. What did you do first when you were fresh, alert and your brain was full of glucose and ready to go? Did you do the tough stuff or did your amygdala take over and guide you to an easy task first to defer the threat?
Try this
Here are some suggestions that might help you do the hard things first – and it’s all about being mindful about what you do and think:
1. Monitor your usual patterns of behaviour to find out (or simply confirm) when you tackle the more mentally demanding work. Do you do it at your freshest or does your amygdala sabotage you in some way?
2. Be very clear about your short and long term goals – make sure the way you do your work is congruent with your objectives
3. Don’t impose the need to be perfect on yourself
4. Watch what you’re saying to yourself mentally e.g. it’s really hard; I need a clear run; I’ll just stuff it up if I start now; I’ll have plenty of time tomorrow; it won’t be any good; I’m just not ready to do it; etc. etc
5. Don’t let your sensitivities and fears hold you back from doing something
6. Break the hard task down into small steps e.g. just do 150 words on it; or cover off on item 1 of the project
7. Give yourself congratulations for the small steps as well as the big ones.
Almonds all around us
The Almond Effect® catches us out in so many ways. It’s not just the big things eg: the fear of restructure, the presentation you have to give or the boss wanting to see you. It’s not just your daughter not coming home when she said she would. There are myriads of everyday occurrences when our amygdalae cause us to do something that is simply not the best course of action if you were to think about it.
So next time you go to your Inbox, just ask yourself if it’s the best time to be doing it? Or are you are putting off doing something that would benefit from the energy you are using up on reading chain mail, the ‘cc’s and pressing the delete button?
If you answered yes to the second question, you know what to do next!
Most of us open the Inbox.
And there’s a good reason why.
Other than the size of it, usually an Inbox is low threat. It needs nowhere near as much brain energy as the big project and we get an instant sense of satisfaction as we delete, delete, delete and clear lots of messages.
And if you ever near the bottom of your inbox – wow, now that’s a buzz.
Your amygdala prefers the Inbox
But why do we do things in that order? You guessed it; it’s The Almond Effect®. We put off the demanding projects because there is much more riding on it than clearing the Inbox.
The project is demanding - we have to focus, concentrate, solve problems and create solutions. And that’s stressful.
In other words, your amygdala senses the project as a threat (The Almond Effect®) so to avoid the threat, you do the non-threatening things first i.e. your Inbox.
Brain drain
The problem with that approach is that even though you are taking the relatively unstressful course of doing your email, you are using up brain energy leaving you less fresh to handle the project when you’ve got no other reason to procrastinate.
Now our brains only have so much capacity before the glucose runs low and our ability to think clearly and innovatively is compromised. Then we have to take a rest and eat or drink sugar.
And our brains will naturally channel our activities to save brain energy where possible – not only is it hard work to use the working memory in our brain but we might need the energy for later when the sabre-tooth tiger appears in our office or home :)
The same thing happens when we need to change – ourselves or others. We put it off because our amygdala senses a threat i.e. it's The Almond Effect®. Unless we think about it and alter the course of action, our brain will guide us to less challenging things first. And before you know it, the day’s simply disappeared and it’s time to go home!
How was your day?
So think about your day. What did you do first when you were fresh, alert and your brain was full of glucose and ready to go? Did you do the tough stuff or did your amygdala take over and guide you to an easy task first to defer the threat?
Try this
Here are some suggestions that might help you do the hard things first – and it’s all about being mindful about what you do and think:
1. Monitor your usual patterns of behaviour to find out (or simply confirm) when you tackle the more mentally demanding work. Do you do it at your freshest or does your amygdala sabotage you in some way?
2. Be very clear about your short and long term goals – make sure the way you do your work is congruent with your objectives
3. Don’t impose the need to be perfect on yourself
4. Watch what you’re saying to yourself mentally e.g. it’s really hard; I need a clear run; I’ll just stuff it up if I start now; I’ll have plenty of time tomorrow; it won’t be any good; I’m just not ready to do it; etc. etc
5. Don’t let your sensitivities and fears hold you back from doing something
6. Break the hard task down into small steps e.g. just do 150 words on it; or cover off on item 1 of the project
7. Give yourself congratulations for the small steps as well as the big ones.
Almonds all around us
The Almond Effect® catches us out in so many ways. It’s not just the big things eg: the fear of restructure, the presentation you have to give or the boss wanting to see you. It’s not just your daughter not coming home when she said she would. There are myriads of everyday occurrences when our amygdalae cause us to do something that is simply not the best course of action if you were to think about it.
So next time you go to your Inbox, just ask yourself if it’s the best time to be doing it? Or are you are putting off doing something that would benefit from the energy you are using up on reading chain mail, the ‘cc’s and pressing the delete button?
If you answered yes to the second question, you know what to do next!
Monday, September 20, 2010
Sit still for a minute!
My life as a comma
I find it hard to sit still. My mind is always buzzing. The moment I sit down I usually jump up again because I think of things I’ve forgotten to do, can’t forget to do or have to do at that moment. When I do sit down, my husband says it’s just a comma in my life!
In fact, unless I am on holiday I feel really uncomfortable, even guilty, just sitting down to read a magazine or novel. And watch a movie or TV during the day? It would be simpler, emotionally, to fly to the moon.
Can you relate to that? What is it that drives this behaviour? And what implications does it have, not only for rest and recharging but also for creative thinking time.
And how does this spill over into our lives at work? How can we be energized and efficient, reflective and strategic if we don’t sit still long enough to let thoughts percolate? How can we build trusting relationships with the team around us if we don’t stay still long enough to be emotionally engaged in the relationship?
The boss who never stops
I thought about Peter. He was a man I worked with many years ago. Peter arrived in the office at 7.30am and was usually the last to leave. He was always on the go – visible, active, always busy but he didn’t get the results that we anticipated. And his relations with his team were poor.
That made me think about a CEO I worked with for a number of years. Let’s call him Simon. Simon was another of those people always on the move. Yet i spent most of that time trying to get him to stay out of the operational areas and focus on being ‘emotionally’ available to his executive team. The challenge was that his comfort zone was in the operational area where he had excelled and charted his very successful career.
Our boss didn’t know us
To put it bluntly, he was shy and uncomfortable talking to people who weren’t his buddies. And it showed. His staff meetings and presentations made us all see and feel his discomfort. He shared plenty of facts and figures, strategy, plans for the future and intelligence about what the competition was up to.
But he never engaged us on a personal level. We didn’t know anything about Simon. And we certainly didn’t believe he knew anything about us.
As a result, people switched off, felt uninspired and did not feel they could raise questions that were on their minds. Simon lacked personal credibility as a leader even though he was a smart and likeable man and a great engineer. Inevitably the good people took their ambitions, ideas and innovative ‘what if’s’ elsewhere and the organization lost serious intellectual capital.
If only Simon had taken the time to get to know people personally, share stories, paid attention to their individual needs, goals and aspirations, helped them overcome their concerns and encouraged and rewarded their enthusiasm. And as a leader, that was his job.
Guilt in the home
I also thought about two women I am close to – a friend and a family member. One works extraordinarily long hours (over 13 hours a day) in a very senior role, then spends almost all of her non-working time looking after her young daughter. Yet she feels guilty if she reads a magazine for 5 minutes or takes time to exercise.
The other woman has just had an operation to remove a cancerous growth. 48 hours after the operation, she is feeling guilty because her pain and exhaustion mean she has to sit still.
Too much activity can sabotage us
As a leader and change catalyst, engendering trust, building relationships, listening to others and garnering emotional commitment are mission critical skills. How else can we get our people on board with cost cutting, streamlining processes, with changing or eliminating practices and behaviours they know and are comfortable with? How else can we excite their curiosity and passion about a new version of the future and what it might mean for them?
Three fundamental of successful change
ChangeTrack Research (CT0508] has identified three fundamentals of successful change:
* Change must make a positive difference to the bottom line
* Trust in leaders. If it evaporates, change falls over
* There is no such thing as ‘one size fits all’
So while Simon and Peter were setting out to achieve the first, their inability or unwillingness to be ‘still’, to be in relationship with their people long enough to work on the other two fundamentals, meant that neither they, nor the companies, achieved their full potential.
What drives this behaviour?
Perhaps it’s a gene and generational thing. I recall my mother, who never sat still herself, made sure that we were always doing something. Sitting and reading was only permissible if it was homework and all the housework was done (almost an impossibility). That’s my recollection yet it’s probably faulty because we now know that each time we recall a memory, we refashion it into the new context. That’s both the ‘beauty and the beast’ of neuro-plasticity.
But unless and until we examine our behaviour drivers, we simply keep doing them and they become ingrained, habitual and hard to change. Even though I know that the implications I draw from my memory may not be accurate, the ‘guilt’ attached to sitting still feels real.
Visibility at work
And at work, what do we value? What have we habitually valued over the years? Even though organisations now talk about focus on outcomes and results, how many managers do you know, still feel uncomfortable if someone is not in the workplace, is working from home, seems to be spending a lot of time talking to others or conversely doesn’t seem to be doing very much at all? Why aren’t they DOING something!
The Almond Effect®
Of course I suspect our Amygdala is also involved in this. So I ask what are we anxious (fearful) about that conjures this need to be constantly on the move and suspect others who aren’t.
As we have discussed many times, The Almond Effect® is when our amygdala triggers reactions to perceived threats that are simply psychological not physical. It doesn’t make it any less real of course.
And thoughts are just that. They are simply constructs in our brains. We can change those thoughts and the feelings and behaviours that go with them. We can apply STAR to these behaviours:
* Stop and catch yourself moving, moving, moving whether it be in your mind or your body
* Think about what’s driving your behaviour and what would be the consequences if you were ‘still’ and reflective for a period
* Act differently – set goals for how long you will be 'still' and 'present' for others
* Rewire – ask yourself if anything disastrous happened when you did reach your goal and stayed ‘still’ whether in mind or body. When you realize it didn’t, rewire that insight and reflection into your memory.
My goal
So I have just been still for the last couple of hours writing this CLUES. Admittedly I am on a plane so that may have an influence! But I am practicing what I preach and am re-training myself to be still both in my mind and body, in the office and at home.
Practicing Mindfulness is one part of that strategy and we will come back to Mindfulness, its role in focusing attention and controlling stress and anxiety (The Almond Effect®) in another CLUES. In the meantime the goal I’m aiming for? That my husband tells me I’ve progressed from a comma to a semi-colon and ultimately to a page break!
I find it hard to sit still. My mind is always buzzing. The moment I sit down I usually jump up again because I think of things I’ve forgotten to do, can’t forget to do or have to do at that moment. When I do sit down, my husband says it’s just a comma in my life!
In fact, unless I am on holiday I feel really uncomfortable, even guilty, just sitting down to read a magazine or novel. And watch a movie or TV during the day? It would be simpler, emotionally, to fly to the moon.
Can you relate to that? What is it that drives this behaviour? And what implications does it have, not only for rest and recharging but also for creative thinking time.
And how does this spill over into our lives at work? How can we be energized and efficient, reflective and strategic if we don’t sit still long enough to let thoughts percolate? How can we build trusting relationships with the team around us if we don’t stay still long enough to be emotionally engaged in the relationship?
The boss who never stops
I thought about Peter. He was a man I worked with many years ago. Peter arrived in the office at 7.30am and was usually the last to leave. He was always on the go – visible, active, always busy but he didn’t get the results that we anticipated. And his relations with his team were poor.
That made me think about a CEO I worked with for a number of years. Let’s call him Simon. Simon was another of those people always on the move. Yet i spent most of that time trying to get him to stay out of the operational areas and focus on being ‘emotionally’ available to his executive team. The challenge was that his comfort zone was in the operational area where he had excelled and charted his very successful career.
Our boss didn’t know us
To put it bluntly, he was shy and uncomfortable talking to people who weren’t his buddies. And it showed. His staff meetings and presentations made us all see and feel his discomfort. He shared plenty of facts and figures, strategy, plans for the future and intelligence about what the competition was up to.
But he never engaged us on a personal level. We didn’t know anything about Simon. And we certainly didn’t believe he knew anything about us.
As a result, people switched off, felt uninspired and did not feel they could raise questions that were on their minds. Simon lacked personal credibility as a leader even though he was a smart and likeable man and a great engineer. Inevitably the good people took their ambitions, ideas and innovative ‘what if’s’ elsewhere and the organization lost serious intellectual capital.
If only Simon had taken the time to get to know people personally, share stories, paid attention to their individual needs, goals and aspirations, helped them overcome their concerns and encouraged and rewarded their enthusiasm. And as a leader, that was his job.
Guilt in the home
I also thought about two women I am close to – a friend and a family member. One works extraordinarily long hours (over 13 hours a day) in a very senior role, then spends almost all of her non-working time looking after her young daughter. Yet she feels guilty if she reads a magazine for 5 minutes or takes time to exercise.
The other woman has just had an operation to remove a cancerous growth. 48 hours after the operation, she is feeling guilty because her pain and exhaustion mean she has to sit still.
Too much activity can sabotage us
As a leader and change catalyst, engendering trust, building relationships, listening to others and garnering emotional commitment are mission critical skills. How else can we get our people on board with cost cutting, streamlining processes, with changing or eliminating practices and behaviours they know and are comfortable with? How else can we excite their curiosity and passion about a new version of the future and what it might mean for them?
Three fundamental of successful change
ChangeTrack Research (CT0508] has identified three fundamentals of successful change:
* Change must make a positive difference to the bottom line
* Trust in leaders. If it evaporates, change falls over
* There is no such thing as ‘one size fits all’
So while Simon and Peter were setting out to achieve the first, their inability or unwillingness to be ‘still’, to be in relationship with their people long enough to work on the other two fundamentals, meant that neither they, nor the companies, achieved their full potential.
What drives this behaviour?
Perhaps it’s a gene and generational thing. I recall my mother, who never sat still herself, made sure that we were always doing something. Sitting and reading was only permissible if it was homework and all the housework was done (almost an impossibility). That’s my recollection yet it’s probably faulty because we now know that each time we recall a memory, we refashion it into the new context. That’s both the ‘beauty and the beast’ of neuro-plasticity.
But unless and until we examine our behaviour drivers, we simply keep doing them and they become ingrained, habitual and hard to change. Even though I know that the implications I draw from my memory may not be accurate, the ‘guilt’ attached to sitting still feels real.
Visibility at work
And at work, what do we value? What have we habitually valued over the years? Even though organisations now talk about focus on outcomes and results, how many managers do you know, still feel uncomfortable if someone is not in the workplace, is working from home, seems to be spending a lot of time talking to others or conversely doesn’t seem to be doing very much at all? Why aren’t they DOING something!
The Almond Effect®
Of course I suspect our Amygdala is also involved in this. So I ask what are we anxious (fearful) about that conjures this need to be constantly on the move and suspect others who aren’t.
As we have discussed many times, The Almond Effect® is when our amygdala triggers reactions to perceived threats that are simply psychological not physical. It doesn’t make it any less real of course.
And thoughts are just that. They are simply constructs in our brains. We can change those thoughts and the feelings and behaviours that go with them. We can apply STAR to these behaviours:
* Stop and catch yourself moving, moving, moving whether it be in your mind or your body
* Think about what’s driving your behaviour and what would be the consequences if you were ‘still’ and reflective for a period
* Act differently – set goals for how long you will be 'still' and 'present' for others
* Rewire – ask yourself if anything disastrous happened when you did reach your goal and stayed ‘still’ whether in mind or body. When you realize it didn’t, rewire that insight and reflection into your memory.
My goal
So I have just been still for the last couple of hours writing this CLUES. Admittedly I am on a plane so that may have an influence! But I am practicing what I preach and am re-training myself to be still both in my mind and body, in the office and at home.
Practicing Mindfulness is one part of that strategy and we will come back to Mindfulness, its role in focusing attention and controlling stress and anxiety (The Almond Effect®) in another CLUES. In the meantime the goal I’m aiming for? That my husband tells me I’ve progressed from a comma to a semi-colon and ultimately to a page break!
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Do you trust your memory? Perhaps you shouldn't
I was chatting with some friends over a lovely Sunday BBQ lunch a couple of weekends back. It was a gorgeous Sydney day – warm, not too hot or humid, the bluest sky you ever saw and only a gentle breeze rustling of the leaves on the gum trees around us.
One of my friends started to tell us all about seeing a couple having an argument in a restaurant. As the story unfolded, his wife who had been in the restaurant with him, started to ‘correct’ him, saying things like: ‘no, she was the one who thumped the table, not him’ and ‘no, you’ve got it wrong, he stormed out first, not her’.
Sadly our friends then started to argue between themselves about who had the correct recollection. Initially they each adamantly believed that they had the right version. Eventually the husband changed his mind and agreed that his wife’s version was correct and that his initial thoughts were wrong.
Now some of you are thinking – of course he’d give in to his wife!
This might be a serious problem
But is this a familiar scenario? i.e. people witness the same event or discussion but their recall and memories of it differ.
Perhaps you’ve even doubted your own memory of what you saw or heard. Yet after talking to other witnesses, you may have changed your mind about what you saw or heard and genuinely agree with and adopt the other version as your own.
That what happened in 1995 during the investigation of the Oklahoma Bombing. You may recall that one witness Tom Kessinger initially said that Timothy McVeigh had an accomplice. Other ‘witnesses’ who had talked with Kessinger and others agreed and this sparked a huge hunt and expenditure in time and resources for the non-existent John Doe No.2.
Kessinger later testified that he was mistaken. There was no accomplice.
Dr Helen Paterson from the University of Sydney is exploring the ramifications of memory recall in the context of contaminated witness testimony in court cases.
You can listen to her talk about her research here. It goes to the heart of witness reliability and may have very serious implications for veracity of evidence from witnesses in trials especially criminal matters where innocence or guilt is determined.
Memories are not fixed
Memories are retrieved usually with the help of some cues – that’s where the problems of The Almond Effect® come in!
And the old thinking was that memories were stable and permanent. All that happened was that they faded with time.
But research has shown that memories are much more malleable and impressionable than that.
So the challenge is that we may not even be recalling accurate memories. Our memories may have become contaminated. For example by taking on other people’s versions of events?
Why can this happen? Well we now know that memories are simply reconstructions. And as such they can be adjusted, changed, tampered with.
False Memories
At one end of the spectrum there is the psychological condition known as False Memory Syndrome. This is where someone has a memory which is a distortion of an actual experience, or a confabulation of an imagined one. Many false memories involve confusing or mixing fragments of memory events, some of which may have happened at different times but which are remembered as occurring together.
However in our day to day lives, we experience this shifting in our memories as simply not quite an accurate reconstruction. For example, we can forget things, include things, ‘remember’ the event as being bigger, smaller, more dramatic, less dramatic, and declare that the fish was over a metre long!
And neuroscientists also tell us that our recall can grow or diminish under the influence of other people’s remembrances.
So what?
We have talked before about the role of ‘history’ in leading change. If you are implementing any kind of change in your organisation, then the way that employees ‘remember’ how change was implemented in the past, its implications and ramifications usually has a major impact on the mindset and willingness of your employees to adopt your proposed changes now.
So you need to pay attention to what has happened during previous organisational change.
And you need to ensure that the recall of the events is accurate.
As Paterson said: "When people remember an event together their memories become more similar to each others' than if they had not had this discussion.
"Through this process, known as memory conformity, a group of people can come to share a single, inaccurate memory for the event."
Evidence based change history
The best way to ensure accurate history is to look to the evidence, notes and records made contemporaneously. However many organisations simply do not keep records of the feelings and reactions of people during the change process. Plenty of project and technical data is recorded for posterity but rarely the qualitative journey.
Test the organisational and individual recollections
So if your organisation doesn’t have such records, you will be relying on people’s recall. This means you’ll need to carefully test and explore any negative memories to get to the reality.
However as you do so, remember that the negative feelings could be the result of The Almond Effect®. And even if the facts are wrong, the emotions evoked by a perceived accurate recollection of an event will be very real indeed.
At the very least ensure that records are kept of both the qualitative and quantitative aspects of the people change management journey so that future change initiatives in your organisation have an accurate history to work from.
One of my friends started to tell us all about seeing a couple having an argument in a restaurant. As the story unfolded, his wife who had been in the restaurant with him, started to ‘correct’ him, saying things like: ‘no, she was the one who thumped the table, not him’ and ‘no, you’ve got it wrong, he stormed out first, not her’.
Sadly our friends then started to argue between themselves about who had the correct recollection. Initially they each adamantly believed that they had the right version. Eventually the husband changed his mind and agreed that his wife’s version was correct and that his initial thoughts were wrong.
Now some of you are thinking – of course he’d give in to his wife!
This might be a serious problem
But is this a familiar scenario? i.e. people witness the same event or discussion but their recall and memories of it differ.
Perhaps you’ve even doubted your own memory of what you saw or heard. Yet after talking to other witnesses, you may have changed your mind about what you saw or heard and genuinely agree with and adopt the other version as your own.
That what happened in 1995 during the investigation of the Oklahoma Bombing. You may recall that one witness Tom Kessinger initially said that Timothy McVeigh had an accomplice. Other ‘witnesses’ who had talked with Kessinger and others agreed and this sparked a huge hunt and expenditure in time and resources for the non-existent John Doe No.2.
Kessinger later testified that he was mistaken. There was no accomplice.
Dr Helen Paterson from the University of Sydney is exploring the ramifications of memory recall in the context of contaminated witness testimony in court cases.
You can listen to her talk about her research here. It goes to the heart of witness reliability and may have very serious implications for veracity of evidence from witnesses in trials especially criminal matters where innocence or guilt is determined.
Memories are not fixed
Memories are retrieved usually with the help of some cues – that’s where the problems of The Almond Effect® come in!
And the old thinking was that memories were stable and permanent. All that happened was that they faded with time.
But research has shown that memories are much more malleable and impressionable than that.
So the challenge is that we may not even be recalling accurate memories. Our memories may have become contaminated. For example by taking on other people’s versions of events?
Why can this happen? Well we now know that memories are simply reconstructions. And as such they can be adjusted, changed, tampered with.
False Memories
At one end of the spectrum there is the psychological condition known as False Memory Syndrome. This is where someone has a memory which is a distortion of an actual experience, or a confabulation of an imagined one. Many false memories involve confusing or mixing fragments of memory events, some of which may have happened at different times but which are remembered as occurring together.
However in our day to day lives, we experience this shifting in our memories as simply not quite an accurate reconstruction. For example, we can forget things, include things, ‘remember’ the event as being bigger, smaller, more dramatic, less dramatic, and declare that the fish was over a metre long!
And neuroscientists also tell us that our recall can grow or diminish under the influence of other people’s remembrances.
So what?
We have talked before about the role of ‘history’ in leading change. If you are implementing any kind of change in your organisation, then the way that employees ‘remember’ how change was implemented in the past, its implications and ramifications usually has a major impact on the mindset and willingness of your employees to adopt your proposed changes now.
So you need to pay attention to what has happened during previous organisational change.
And you need to ensure that the recall of the events is accurate.
As Paterson said: "When people remember an event together their memories become more similar to each others' than if they had not had this discussion.
"Through this process, known as memory conformity, a group of people can come to share a single, inaccurate memory for the event."
Evidence based change history
The best way to ensure accurate history is to look to the evidence, notes and records made contemporaneously. However many organisations simply do not keep records of the feelings and reactions of people during the change process. Plenty of project and technical data is recorded for posterity but rarely the qualitative journey.
Test the organisational and individual recollections
So if your organisation doesn’t have such records, you will be relying on people’s recall. This means you’ll need to carefully test and explore any negative memories to get to the reality.
However as you do so, remember that the negative feelings could be the result of The Almond Effect®. And even if the facts are wrong, the emotions evoked by a perceived accurate recollection of an event will be very real indeed.
At the very least ensure that records are kept of both the qualitative and quantitative aspects of the people change management journey so that future change initiatives in your organisation have an accurate history to work from.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Clues Emotions spread like viruses
‘I‘d like my life back’
When Tony Hayward, CEO of BP at the time of the Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill said these words, millions of people shuddered. It was a careless, stupid and thoughtless thing to say when the human, environmental and economic cost of the BP disaster is almost incalculable.
His apparent insensitivity was made emphasised by reports and footage taken of him sailing off the Isle of Wight shortly after.
I doubt anyone felt sorry for him though if you know about The Almond Effect®, you’ll know where that statement came from.
The Almond Effect® - Lack of judgment
His words and actions showed a complete lack of judgment. It was The Almond Effect® in full force. Tired, battered, desperate for a solution and an end to the disaster, Hayward wasn’t thinking. His emotional brain was talking.
This was a very public example of the need we all have to manage our amygdala and develop the skills to think before we speak or act.
Split second actions
Can you, like me, think of times when you wish you could go back in time and regain the opportunity to do or say something differently?
The email or SMS sent too quickly, the words that just tumbled out of your mouth, the inappropriate facial expression or body language, the action you regret – all happening in a split second, without thinking, just reacting – like Hayward.
Not stopping to think about the impact of what you say or do on others.
Do you use one-liners and throw-away lines?
One-liners and throw-away lines fall into the same category. The words are probably meant to be funny but instead make the target of the remarks and people around at the time cringe? It’s another example of our amygdala talking, it’s certainly not the thinking brain unless we rationally intend to do emotional harm.
Emotions spread like viruses
In addition to the stupidity of the words, there is another element to Hayward’s blunder that is almost as scary – and it impacts all of us who want to bring about change at work. It is the speed with which Hayward’s gaffe, and the negative emotions associated with it, spread around the globe.
We know that emotions are contagious. People catch emotions the way they catch a cold.
Now add the power of global media and social networking into the mix.
How long does it take a negative comment in your place to spread? How many of your people are on Facebook, twitter or simply SMS. In addition to the chatter, facial expressions and body language, all it takes is a phone.
Lessons for leaders
When you take on the role of leader, I believe you also take on the responsibility to watch every word that comes out of your mouth, especially when you’re tired, stressed, having a bad day, had an argument at home or simply that your coffee tastes awful.
Learn the skills to recognise your triggers and ANTs before your amygdala precipitates you into saying or doing something you regret or that negatively impacts changes you are trying to bring about in your organisation.
This skill that will not only make you a leader that people want to follow but it will significantly enhance your career.
When Tony Hayward, CEO of BP at the time of the Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill said these words, millions of people shuddered. It was a careless, stupid and thoughtless thing to say when the human, environmental and economic cost of the BP disaster is almost incalculable.
His apparent insensitivity was made emphasised by reports and footage taken of him sailing off the Isle of Wight shortly after.
I doubt anyone felt sorry for him though if you know about The Almond Effect®, you’ll know where that statement came from.
The Almond Effect® - Lack of judgment
His words and actions showed a complete lack of judgment. It was The Almond Effect® in full force. Tired, battered, desperate for a solution and an end to the disaster, Hayward wasn’t thinking. His emotional brain was talking.
This was a very public example of the need we all have to manage our amygdala and develop the skills to think before we speak or act.
Split second actions
Can you, like me, think of times when you wish you could go back in time and regain the opportunity to do or say something differently?
The email or SMS sent too quickly, the words that just tumbled out of your mouth, the inappropriate facial expression or body language, the action you regret – all happening in a split second, without thinking, just reacting – like Hayward.
Not stopping to think about the impact of what you say or do on others.
Do you use one-liners and throw-away lines?
One-liners and throw-away lines fall into the same category. The words are probably meant to be funny but instead make the target of the remarks and people around at the time cringe? It’s another example of our amygdala talking, it’s certainly not the thinking brain unless we rationally intend to do emotional harm.
Emotions spread like viruses
In addition to the stupidity of the words, there is another element to Hayward’s blunder that is almost as scary – and it impacts all of us who want to bring about change at work. It is the speed with which Hayward’s gaffe, and the negative emotions associated with it, spread around the globe.
We know that emotions are contagious. People catch emotions the way they catch a cold.
Now add the power of global media and social networking into the mix.
How long does it take a negative comment in your place to spread? How many of your people are on Facebook, twitter or simply SMS. In addition to the chatter, facial expressions and body language, all it takes is a phone.
Lessons for leaders
When you take on the role of leader, I believe you also take on the responsibility to watch every word that comes out of your mouth, especially when you’re tired, stressed, having a bad day, had an argument at home or simply that your coffee tastes awful.
Learn the skills to recognise your triggers and ANTs before your amygdala precipitates you into saying or doing something you regret or that negatively impacts changes you are trying to bring about in your organisation.
This skill that will not only make you a leader that people want to follow but it will significantly enhance your career.
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